Conversation Starter Tips for Dating

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Having good conversation starter skills are key to any successful dating or marriage relationship. Have you ever seen a dating couple enjoying a great conversation? You can just see and feel those sparks flying all over the place! Learning how to have good conversations with your potential soul mate will not only help you both grow closer, but will also make for a much more enjoyable dating experience.

Yet, how many of us seem at a loss when we try to start a conversation? Later on, we kick ourselves for not saying that funny thing or timely word. Duh! However, if you put into practice the following conversation starter tips for dating, you are on your way to succeeding in the future.

Conversation Starter Advice

Conversation Starter Tip 1: Don’t Hog the Ball!

We all hated that when we were kids, and as single adults we hate it when someone hogs a conversation. Remember, a good conversation starts with a dialogue, not a monologue. That means allowing your date to get in some of his or her thoughts as well.

Ever meet a person who asks you how you are doing, but then before you can open your mouth they spend the next 10 minutes droning on about their stuff? The bottom line is it’s boring and annoying all rolled into one, so don’t do it, okay?

Conversation Starter Tip 2: Show an Interest in Their Passion

Everyone enjoys speaking about themselves and their interests. So discover what your boyfriend or girlfriend is passionate about, and ask them sincere, open ended questions about the topic. You will see your date come alive, and a nice and easy flowing conversation will ensue. You may also find out something interesting and surprising about your single friend that you didn’t already know.

Conversation Starter Tip 3: Be Prepared with Topics

Think about some interesting topics to discuss from daily events, news or funny things that have happened to you recently. Just remember to avoid boring or controversial topics, like talking incessantly about the ex-girlfreind or boyfriend. This happens to be the number one complaint singles give about their dating partners.

Conversation Starter Tip 4: Give Them Undivided Attention

When you are having a conversation with your friend, make sure you concentrate solely on them. Look intently into their eyes while they are speaking. This not only makes them feel important, but will give them the impression that you really do care about what they are saying. And you do, right?

Conversation Starter Tip 5: Be Vulnerable

It’s hard to start a conversation with an overly guarded person. Hanging out with such a person is also a huge turnoff. Hey, we’re not saying you should be giving away your bank account number to strangers, but opening up your heart a little bit by sharing your feelings helps the other person relax, and makes them open to sharing as well.

Conversation Starter Tip 6: Understand Body Language

Did you know that 93% of communication is non-verbal? So when you are starting a conversation with your date, take cues from their body language to assess if you are communicating well.

Good signs to look for when having a conversation: Leaning forward to you, dilated pupils, revealing palms and wrists, smiling, or uncrossed arms and legs. As you might have guessed, a dating tipoff that your conversation is not going well would include: folded arms and/or legs, rolling eyes, smirks, yawns, leaning back and looking away from your eye contact. A smart communicator will gauge body language, and adjust their conversation accordingly.

I’m sure there are many other conversation starter tips we haven’t shared. Feel free to share and help others if you have any other conversation dating tips.

Related Article:Â

Conversations to Avoid with Your DateÂ

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Courtship Love or Casual Dating

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The casual dating versus courtship love debate rages on in some conservative Christian circles. Ever since Joshua Harris’ bestselling book, I Kissed Dating Goodbye came out, this question has come to the forefront: Should Christian singles interested in the opposite sex practice casual dating or Christian courtship?

But let’s pose another question that cuts to the heart of the matter: Which model, casual dating or courtship, has better end results viz-a-viz pre-marital sex, domestic violence, infidelity and divorce rates?

Both sides voice their highly dogmatic views, but the raw truth of the matter is that we simply don’t yet know the answer. It’s going to take several decades before Christian social scientists can measure what real difference, if any, the modern courtship love movement has made on marriages and families. Until then, I believe both sides should put James 1:19 into practice: “Wherefore, my beloved brethren, let every man be swift to listen, slow to speak, slow to wrath.”

By the way, what do most single Christians feel about the issue? They’re mostly apathetic and the vast majority date in traditional ways as their parents and grandparents did.

For our part, Christian Dating Service PLUS does not believe in the concept of casual dating because we feel:

• A romantic relationship should never be an end in itself, but should have the goal of working toward marriage. Additionally, if the couple are single Christians, we would expect that this relationship would be under the lordship of Jesus.

However, we also believe there is a place for traditional dating outside the teen years, and so don’t feel the courtship and dating issue needs to be couched as an either/or proposition. The best of dating and courtship can be combined.

Are you a singles pastor or Christian single with a different take on casual dating and courtship? Please help other singles sharing your views on courtship and love.

Related Links:

Kissing an Online Christian Dating Service Hello

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Dating After Divorce

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Dating after divorce for Christians is wrought with theological and emotional minefields. So before discussing dating tips for the newly divorced, let us express our simple views on what we feel the Bible teaches about divorce and remarriage. A future article will discuss this in depth.

The bottom line is God hates divorce (Mal. 2:16), and desires couples to reconcile if at all possible. However, under certain circumstances where there has been unrepentant infidelity, the offended party may divorce and remarry. Of course, no one remarries without first going through a dating or courtship process.

Finally, we believe dating after divorce should never be an end in itself, but should be part of a process that leads toward a lifelong commitment in marriage. Okay, ready to talk about some dating tips?

Dating After Divorce Tips

Take it Slow

Hello? You’ve just experienced the death of a relationship that you thought would last forever. You NEED time to grieve and heal. What we teach folks in Family Divorce Court classes is that they should do their best to avoid a dating after divorce relationship for at least one year after their divorce. Why?

• Because you need to reacquaint yourself with who you are as a single person. For so long you may of thought in terms of “us”, but you are now alone. It’s a time for soul searching, taking stock of what went wrong and seeking the Lord for new direction in your life (Proverbs 3:5,6).

• Not dating during this period of adjustment will save you from making stupid, impulsive mistakes. Remember, whether you admit it or not, you are in a vulnerable, needy state, and your self esteem has taken a beating. You could be taken advantage of during this time, and hearts could be further broken.

• Even though you may be doubting your appeal to the opposite sex at this time, getting into rebound relationships will only delay your healing process. That’s a fact. Furthermore, statistics show that the vast majority of people who date shortly after a separation and/or divorce have a difficult time remaining sexually pure, make regrettable moral choices and tend to repeat prior relationship mistakes.

• When you are finally ready to date again, you may want to consider the benefits of online dating. By starting online, you can proceed at your own pace in the safety of your own home.

Think of your children first

If you have children, the very worst thing you could inflict upon them is dating before you and they have properly healed and acclimated to a new way of life. Most kids dream about mommy and daddy getting back together again. That’s why they need time to face reality. When the time does come to introduce the children to your dating partner, this article on single parents dating and their kids may help.

Join a support group

There are many Christian singles groups specifically designed for the newly divorced, whether they have children or not. These can be a wonderful help to you and your family. Groups like DivorceCare.com meet all over the world and offer emotional and spiritual support. Here you can also meet people in your area who are struggling with similar dating issues.

If you are a single divorcee or Christian with views to share on dating after divorce, please help other singles by voicing your comments.

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