Oasis Church NJ † Christian Podcasts on Dating, Parenting, Marriage, Finances, Life » 2006 » October

Divorce and Remarriage Podcast

Oasis Church NJ — Mon, 30 Oct 2006 03:05:10 +0000

Divorce and remarriage is a hot issue in many evangelical churches, because many Christian singles have been through a divorce. Needless to say, many Christians are confused when it comes to the issue of divorce and remarriage.

Divorce and Remarriage Teachings

What are the biblical grounds for divorce anyway? Does God speak against divorce and remarriage in all circumstances? If divorce is justified in certain situations? When is dating after divorce okay? Do the rules change if you are a Christian single parent dating with kids? These are only some of the questions Christian have pertaining to the divorce and remarriage conflict.

Divorce and Remarriage Podcast

In our Christian dating Service PLUS podcast of the week, Pastor John Minnema, of Hawthorne Gospel Church in Hawthorne, NJ, tackles some of the difficult issue of divorce and remarriage, speaking out of the book of Genesis.

By the way, if you have a church, singles/dating ministry site, para-church group or college campus outreach,lwe will help you reach more singles by podcasting your Christian singles group’s message, music or video, with a credited link back to your address. If you only have tapes or CDs, we will convert that for you into an MP3 format for broadcasting. For more info about this free service, please feel free to contact us.

Are you a single Christian with your own view on divorce and remarriage?
Related Articles:

Dating After Divorce
Christian Singles Dating Unbelievers
Dating Tip Advice: How to Spot a Dating Married Man
Christian Single Moms and Dating Tips

Related Reading on Divorce and Remarriage

Marriage, Divorce and Remarriage in the Bible-Jay Adams
Remarraige afte Divorce in Today’s Church-Mark Strauss, et. al
Divorce and Remarriage-Curtis Hutson

Return to Christian-Dating-Service-PLUS Home

Conversation Starters to Avoid Using With Your Date

Oasis Church NJ — Sat, 28 Oct 2006 01:44:45 +0000

Conversation starter skills are a must if you don’t want to bore your date half to death. Almost every Christian single person has had that sinking feeling that they were losing their date’s interest while conversing with them in person or thru an online dating site like Eharmony

Singles with good conversation starter and communication skills are successful at keeping their dates fascinated and involved because they do do two simple things very well:

They avoid so called conversation starters that bore or annoy him or her
They develop their own conversation starter skills with their date by determining what makes them perk up

Conversation Starter Tips: What To Avoid-Or at Least Go Easy On

One of the purposes of dating is to have conversations with the other person to determine whether or not the other person is your true love or dating match.

While it’s important to have easy flowing conversation starters, take care when speaking with your date about the following topics:

Health Issues

If you’re thinking this is a good conversation starter, forgettaboutit! While you may gain some sympathy in the short run, as a hypochondriac I can tell you from experience that you will inevitably turn your date off as you rattle off your litany of ills.

Of course, serious health concerns can and should be shared at the proper time, but do we really need to know about the runs you had last night? You get the point.

Ex Anythings

Nothing bores a date quicker, but this failed “conversation starter” is a perrenial favourite of many, to their own demise. Not only is this a major turn off, if gives the impression they are dealing with a rebound dater. Bad. Very bad.

The Bible

I may get stoned for this, so if you don’t see this site tomorrow you know what happened. Look, incessant Bible quoting during a date is boring and obnoxious. Now I’m not talking about heart felt sharing about your faith, or deep and interesting theological discussions that bring up the Scriptures.

I am speaking about the stooges who have to pepper in Bible quotations during every conversation. Here’s an example:”Praise the Lord, this food tastes great. Hey, could you pass that salt? Speaking of salt, did you know in Matthew 5:13 Jesus states that you are the salt of the earth?” Please don’t…it’s not attractive.

Gossip

Ever been around someone who had negative things to say about someone else when they weren’t around? Human nature being what it is, you may be tempted to use gossip as a conversation starter with your date. Don’t do it. Besides being unpleasing to the Lord, your date may begin to wonder what kinds of things you tell others about her when she’s not around. Get it?

No single person, male or female, has it all together when it comes to conversation starters. If you don’t confident in this area, just remember learning how to start a conversation with the opposite sex in learning process.

Are you a Christian single with something to share about dating and conversation starters?

Return to Christian-Dating-Service-PLUS Home

Christian Chatrooms for Christian Singles Chat

Oasis Church NJ — Fri, 27 Oct 2006 02:03:02 +0000

Christian Chatrooms are locations on the web where Christian singles can chat or converse with other singles. In a mood for a nice Christian chat? In a Christian chatroom, one can find a date, share prayer requests or just have some fellowship.

Many Christian dating services, including Christian Cafe and Christian Mingle have Christian chatrooms on their sites as a free service to both their free trial and paid members. Since there are literally hundreds of Christian chat rooms online (see some of our favorite Christian chatrooms below), we thought it important remind singles about how to make your chatroom experience more positive.

Christian Chatroom Tips for Singles

Christian Chatroom Tip 1: Diversify

This Christian chatroom tip is the same advice we give for those singles interested in using an online Christian dating service. Christian chatrooms are great places to find compatible singles for dating relationships. However, each Christian chatroom offers a different twist or benefit.

Therefore, our recommendation is to try out a number to try out a number of Christian chatrooms in order to see which ones fit your needs.

Christian Chatroom Tip 2: Know the Rules of the Chat Game

Every Christian chatroom operates differently, and each has their own form of online etiquette. Therefore, in order to increase your chance for a positve experience, try first reading each sites’s FAQs before using that particular Christian chatroom or forum.

For example, some Christian chatrooms offer only public discussion chats, while others allow for private one-on-one conversations. Additionally, some Christian chatrooms are moderated by the the chatroom owners, and have specified topics, while others are a free for all. Bottom line: Knowing how each Christian chatroom operates before diving in head first will help you get what you are seeking faster.

Christian Chatroom Tip 3: Enter with Something to Chat About

There are quite a few singles who feel Christian chatrooms are a total waste of time. However, many of these folks have had bad expereinces because they never learned how to converse in a Christian chatroom. While this article on good conversation starter tips does not totally apply to Christian chatrooms, you might find it quite helpful. As one single girl recently told me, “Nothing is quite as annoying, boring and depressing than people who pop in with nothing to say.”

Christian Chatroom Tip 4: Think Safety First.

We are referring to two different types of safety. The first has to do with maintaining your personal online safety while using online dating tools like a Christian chatroom.In this regard, knowing something about email etiquette and safety tips will also help you in Christian chatrooms.

The second has to do with protecting your computer. Beware of attachments that may contain viruses or spyware. If you feel a need to accept an attachment from someone in a Christian chatroom, run it through a virus scan. I can’t tell you the number of bugs I picked up in chatrooms.

Christian Chatroom Tip 5: Remember You have a Life Offline

Christian chatrooms, like much if the internet, can be highly addicting. If you find yourself shirking your real life responsibilities, limit your Christian chatroom time by scheduling set times for going online.

Join Christian Mingle for FREE!

Some of the Top Christian Chatrooms:

http://www.ablazenet.com/

http://www.christianchat.co.uk/privacy.php

http://christianchat.com/

http://www.christianchatforum.com/

http://www.chatmag.com/topics/religion/christian.html

http://www.worthychat.com/

http://www.ukchatterbox.co.uk/christian/

http://christianchat.net/

http://www.christianchatrooms.com/

http://www.irc-nl.org/christian-chat.htm

Are you a single Christian with something to share about Christian chatrooms?

Return to Christian-Dating-Service-PLUS Home

True Love Signs-How to Tell if it’s True Love or Lust

Oasis Church NJ — Tue, 24 Oct 2006 04:56:52 +0000

Is is true love or simple physical attraction and lust? What are true love signs for Christian singles dating? How do you know you’ve found your “true love” of a life time? Whether your relationship began in person or online thru a site like Eharmony this article may help

Is It True Love?

The following true love prerequisites will help you gauge whether or not this person is “the one”:

True Love: The relationship causes both parties to grow closer to Jesus

True Love: There is implicit trust and no fear of being vulnerable

True Love: The couple has great communication with each other

True Love: Neither party doubts the truthfulness of the other

True Love: True love waits for sexual intimacy. Intense physical
attraction, but neither party defrauds the other (1 Thes. 4:6,7)

True Love: When there are disagreements (if you never had any, someone’s
not being real), the daters have learned how to argue,
but still remain close

True Love: There is no jealousy or controlling behavior.

True Love: Family members and friends confirm and approve of the dating relationship.

Closing True Love Thoughts

Of course, the above is not an exhaustive list of true love signs, but is useful in helping singles assess the potential of a true love match.

Is there such a thing as one true love, or can there be a number of “true loves” in one’e life?

Return to Christian-Dating-Service-PLUS Home

SoulMate? Discovering Your Christian Soulmate Podcast

Oasis Church NJ — Mon, 23 Oct 2006 03:39:01 +0000

Have you discovered your soulmate? Most Christian singles who visit Christian Dating Service PLUS! are interested in finding that special soulmate or dating match that will lead toward marriage.

Do You Have a Soulmate?

Our featured Christian dating podcast this week comes from The Journey Church was founded by Pastor Nelson Searcy and is a contemporary Christian church located in Manhattan, New York City. In today’s church podcast, Pastor Kerrick Thomas helps us answer the question: Do I have a soulmate?

Each week Christian Dating Service PLUS! broadcasts a different podcast/MP3 with Christian singles messages, music or video. This week the topic is soulmates; however, we will podcast any topic related to the Christian single life.

Since we reach thousands of singles each week, let us help you expand your outreach by sending us your church’s or Christian singles group’s message, music or video. We will convert your tapes or CDs into an MP3 format, and podcast it for free over the web with a link back to your site. For more info about this, please feel free to contact us.

Finally, feel free to share your comments or thoughts about soulmates.

Related Articles:

Benefits of Seeking a Soulmate Online

Return to Christian-Dating-Service-PLUS Home

Dating Match: Are You Dating Your Match?

Oasis Church NJ — Sun, 22 Oct 2006 01:29:36 +0000

Dating match? When most Christian singles use the term, “dating match”, they are referring to a soul mate, that person with whom they feel they can spend the rest of their lives. Many have the following question when it comes to the topic of a dating match:

How do I go about finding my dating match?

This is an important dating question, which doesn’t come with any easy answers. However, if you are seeking your dating match, the following may help you along in the process.

Dating Match Checklist

Dating Match Tip 1: Get Your Own Stuff Together

This must be your first step toward finding your dating match. You’ve probably heard it before: “Before you can attract the right person (your dating match), you have to be the right person.” It sounds corny and old, but it’s really true. Think about it. If you don’t know who you are as far as what makes you tick, and/or you’re not comfortable with who are, are you in any condition to meet your dating match? Don’t even go there. You already know the answer.

Dating Match Tip 2: Cast Your Vision

This means envisioning your dating match by making a list of attributes of what you’re looking for in a dating match including looks, emotional make-up, spiritutal maturity, age, occupation, location, etc. Include your family and friends as you gather data because they will ensure realistic objectivity.

Dating Match Tip 3: Pursue Your Goal, Taking Risks by Faith

Your goal is to meet your dating match of a lifetime. Although there are many ways single Christians can meet each other, oftentimes this entails putting ourselves in a vulnerable position. If this includes using an online Christian dating service, make sure you do it the right way. As a side note, if you’re confused over the issue of how one can wait on the Lord and pursue your dating match goal simultaneously, read this.

In a forthcoming article, we will share how you will know it when you are dating your match. Are you a Christian single with something to share regarding your dating match?

Related Articles:

Meet Attractive Christian Singles

Return to Christian-Dating-Service-PLUS Home

Christian Dating Advice

Oasis Church NJ — Tue, 17 Oct 2006 03:52:43 +0000

One can find Christian dating advice all over the internet. The problem is that the “Christian dating advice” you get on the web may not be from a morally reputable dating site.

Look at the Source of Your Christian Dating Advice

For example, on one particular dating site, you can find Christian relationship dating advice on the sidebar right next to Transexual dating advice. With so much junk out there it’s important to know from where you are getting your Christian dating advice.

One of the reasons we started Christian Dating Service PLUS! was to counteract the crazy Christian dating advice out there by providing Biblical, practical and fun Christian dating advice.

The unique thing about this site is that if you are a Christian single, minister, counselor, etc., you may submit your own Christian dating advice articles and podcasts for publication on our site. Find out the cool benefits about why you would want to submit a Christian dating advice or singles related article.

If you take a look at our sitemap you will see Christian dating advice regarding dating tips, relationship problems, dating site reviews and other issues.

Christian Dating Advice Offline

One of the best places besides the internet where you can find great Christian dating advice is through some excellent Christian authors. Here is a list of some of our favorite Christian dating advice books which can be purchased inexpensively online through Amazon.com:

God’s Design for Christian Dating
10 Commandments Of Dating
Devotions For Dating Couples: Building A Foundation For Spiritual Intimacy
Boundaries in Dating
The One: A Realistic Guide To Choosing Your Soul Mate
Choices: Finding God’s Way in Dating, Sex, Singleness, and Marriage
Finding the Love of Your Life: Ten Principles for Choosing the Right Marriage Partner
I Gave Dating a Chance: A Biblical Perspective to Balance the Extremes
Recovering a Biblical View of Christian Dating
Romancing The Web: A Therapist’s Guide To Online Dating
Black Christian Singles Guide to Dating and Sexuality
Ending Violence In Teen Dating Relationships

Return to Christian-Dating-Service-PLUS Home

Love, Sex and the Bible: Christian Dating Podcast

Oasis Church NJ — Sun, 15 Oct 2006 05:54:36 +0000

Love, Sex and the Bible. These are topics most all Christian singles find most interesting. This week our first Christian dating podcast features Pastor Tim Lucas, from Liquid Church in Morristown, NJ. His message, “Love, Sex and the Bible”, is an awesome talk about Christian dating. In addition to this Christian podcast, “Love, Sex and the Bible” can also be listened to via MP3 format on our on site media player (see below) or downloaded through your own computer. Enjoy!

Love, Sex and the Bible: Our First Christian Singles Dating Podcast!

By the way, each week Christian Dating Service PLUS! will be featuring a different podcast/MP3 with Christian singles messages, music or video from churches and Christian singles groups all over the world. “Love, Sex and the Bible” was just our first. Hooray!

Every week we reach thousands of Christian singles, so if you want your church’s or Christian singles group’s message, song or video podcasted on our site, please feel free to contact us.

Are you a single person with something to share about the Christian dating podcast, Love, Sex and the Bible?

Related Articles:

Marriage Builder Tips for Healthy Relationships
Christian Singles, Singleness and Marriage

Return to Christian-Dating-Service-PLUS Home

Singles and Holidays: How to Survive the Holiday Blues as a Single Person

Oasis Church NJ — Sat, 14 Oct 2006 02:49:03 +0000

Singles and Holidays don’t always mix. That’s why learning how to survive and thrive during the holiday season is an important thing for singles to learn. Since holidays are marketed for families, singles who are alone are often made to feel like outsiders crashing a party. Talk about the holiday blues!

How Singles Prepare for the Holidays

As Christian single women and men dreading yet another holiday season alone, you’re probably struggling or thinking about:

Where you’re going to spend the holidays to avoid loneliness
How unfair it is that another Christmas is coming, and you’re still single
What you’re gonna tell or do to those relatives who ask you again why you’re not yet married.

Holiday Do’s and Don’ts for Singles

As you reflect upon how to approach the holidays this season, it’s important to celebrate in a way you feel comfortable as a single person, whether you are dating or not. As you begin to see all the commercialism, decorations and hype, let the following holiday do’s and don’ts guide you:

Holiday Do’s for Singles

Focus on the birth of our dear Lord and Saviour, Jesus, as the focal point of your holiday. Not to employ an overused cliche, but He is, after all, the Reason for the season.

Do remember that as a single you have the same need and right to enjoy this holiday season as any other couple or family does. So if you want to decorate your home or apartment, do it up good! How you choose to spend the holidays is your personal choice, not that of those around you. Before being cajoled by friends and family members to attend this event or that party, ask yourself if this is really what you want to do. Will it make you feel more lonely and depressed? Will it bring others AND you some measure of joy?

As a single Christian, set level expectations for the holidays. Have fun in the way you see fit, but don’t allow the world to pressure you into unrealistic expectations of what the holiday time should bring. That way, if things don’t go that way, there will be less disappointment and hurt.

Jesus said “it’s more blessed to give than to receive.” So, make this Christmas a time of service to others instead of focusing on your own needs and wants as a single person. Doing things such as feeding the poor or visiting the sick will not only help you put the holidays into their proper perspective, it will cause your spirits to soar! We guarantee it.

If you have not already done so, find a Christian singles group or church in your area where you can find and give support to other singles during the holidays. If you’re not part of any group, why not throw a holiday bash for other single friends you know?

Make sure to count every blessing the Lord has granted to you during the past year.

Holiday Don’ts for Singles

Avoid using too much alcohol (Ephesians 5:18) to cope with holiday stress because this tends to make one depressed.

As singles, we tend to overbook ourselves to the point of exhaustion. Make sure you don’t do this this holiday season, but give yourself plenty of down time to relax and rest. Fatique can lead to negative thought patterns.

Don’t spend all your holiday time with family members and other couples, but split the time to be with your single friends as well. This will help you keep a more positive perspective while enjoying everybody’s company

Overall, however you choose to celebrate the Christmas or New Year Holidays, remember to be safe, trust in God’s promises for your future (Jeremiah 29:11) and have fun! Happy Holidays!

Are you a Christian single person with added thoughts on how to survive the holidays?

Related Articles:

Stress and the Single Christian
Lonely Women Who Are Single
Anxiety Attacks and Being Single
Contentment Living the Christian Single Life
Hope for Singles This Christmas
Holiday Gifts-The Greatst Holiday Gift of All

Return to Christian-Dating-Service-PLUS

Christian Men Who Make Stupid Dating Mistakes

Oasis Church NJ — Wed, 11 Oct 2006 04:37:22 +0000

Many Christian men, myself included, have made dating mistakes. But yo, Christian Men! Can we talk? A lot of you Christian Men out there keep making the same stupid dating mistakes. In fact, I’m really tired of single Christian men whining about not being able to meet any nice girls, when it’s their own goofs that are driving away the promising possibilities.

Our simple piece of dating advice is that many Christian men can avoid making dating mistakes in the future by simply learning what they are, and taking appropriate steps to sincerely change.

Christian Men Dating Mistakes to Avoid

Christian Men Mistake: Being Out Of Touch With Her Needs

Every woman has heart needs. Not understanding or caring about what Christain Girls Want in a Guy means you’re probably in the group of whiners we already spoke about. All I’ll say is: If you don’t know your playbook, how can you play?

Christian Men Mistake: Failing to Communicate Your True Feelings

Many guys, including Christian men, have a difficult time expressing their feeling. This happens for a variety of reasons. Some Christian men suffer from low self-esteem, so their fears of rejection hold them from sharing their heart with a woman. Other Christian men never learned how to converse with the opposite sex.

Christian Men Mistake: Acting Too Meek and Needy

Can anybody say milquetoast? A whole lot of Christian men make this boo boo by over exaggerating their sense of Christian meekness in order to win a girl’s heart. Yeah, girls love sensitive guys, but not weasels who pander to their every whim as an over pleasing “yes man.”

By the way, the Biblical meaning of meekness actually means “controlled power”, the exact quality women find irresistible. For better or worse, most women are attracted to men who are perceived as being powerful. Ever wondered why a lot of good girls date bad guys? It’s connected to this phenomenon. Christian men, do you think you can strike a balance here somewhere?

Christian Men Mistake: Yacking About The Ex

My brother did this last week while we were having dinner with his new girlfriend. I tried to kick his leg under the table, but I missed. Bottom line: Nothing soaks the kindling flames of a budding romance more. Too much talk about the ex, and she may think you’re taking her as a rebound relationship.

Christian Men Mistake: Compromising Your Spiritual Walk to Get the Girl

Are you doing things you would not normally do only to impress a girl? That’s not a sign of a healthy Christian dating relationship, and you’ll end up regretting it when the relationship ends. Read chapter 5 and 6 in Proverbs if you don’t believe me.

Overall, no dating relationship is perfect. However, Christian men can improve their chances at at having a satisfying experience if they avoid the above mistakes.

Do you have something to share about dating mistakes and Christian men?

Related Articles:

Dating Advice: How to Have Good Communication With Dating Singles