Dating Christians and Their Messed Up Sex Lives

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Here’s a fact: Many dating Christians have messed up sex lives. No, I’m not talkin’ bout those dating Christians who are suffering through the agony of waiting until after marriage to unleash their passion. I am referring to dating Christians who do indulge in sex.

Dating Christians and Spiritual Unhappiness

Although survey after survey shows dating Christians have sex before marriage almost as frequently as your run of the mill unbeliever, many involved in this activity never planned on it happening. And most pertinent to our dating Christian pod-cast, they’re not really happy about dating relationship consequences.

Let’s be real here. Sex feels really good! However, most dating Christians who have been involved in sexual relationships will tell you, the pleasure comes with a big price. As one dating Christian relayed, “I could experience pleasure, but pleasure with peace was impossible because I was grieving the Holy Spirit.” Wow, now that’s really messed up!

Are you a dating Christian who feels like you have messed up your sex life? Do you have trouble getting over the past because of past sins and mistakes? If so, Pastor Ed Young of Fellowship Church, Dallas, Texas (TX), brings a great message aptly called “Messed Up”. This pod-cast is all about hope and how dating Christians who have made relationship mistakes, can experience that real joy and peace again. This is definitely worth a listen.

Are you a dating Christian with something to share about your sex life?

Related:

Self Control and the Single Christian Life

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Find a Girlfriend Online

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Many Christian guys write us asking advice on how they can find a girlfriend. Most say they can’t find a girlfriend whose a Christian because there are simply not enough of them to go around at church or the in area they hang out.

Our dating advice is this: If you have exhausted traditional ways in your quest to find a girlfriend, why nor try an online Christian dating service like eHarmony? After all, thousands each year find a girlfriend and potential mate in this way. In fact, if you’re out to find a girlfriend, there are many reason to try doing it online.

4 Steps Needed to Find a Girlfriend Online

Find a Girlfriend Tip 1-Know What You Are Looking For.

It’s great that you want to try to find a girlfriend online. But if you don’t have an idea of the kind of person it is you want to meet, how will ever be successful? In this sense, it all starts with vision.

Find a Girlfriend Tip 2-Understand the Difference Between Good and Bad

Yeah, there ARE a lot of bad dating sites out there. So if you want to be a satisfied customer, become an educated customer. Understanding the qualities of what makes a good dating site will help you have a successful online dating experience. We’ve listed some of the top sites Christians use right here.

Find a Girlfriend Tip 3-Learn How to Use Online Sites

If you want to find a girlfriend online, you also need to know how to use the services. There are some guys who have failed to find a girlfreind online because they never took the time to learn how they work from start to finish. it’s like having a great powerful racing car, but not being able to drive it because you don’t know how to shift gears. was that a lame analogy? I suppose, I guess you get the point.

The absolute best way to learn the ropes of online dating is to join a couple of the free trial dating services, and poke around their sites. Afterwards, you can pick out the one that suits you best. By the way, all of those listed on Christian Dating Service PLUS! have free trial periods.

Find a Girlfreind Tip 4-Ask the Girl Out

This is where many seeking to find a girlfriend falter, but reading some dating advice on how to ask someone out may help find you a Christian girlfriend.

Related to Find a Girlfriend:

Online Dating Services for Singles Christians

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Dealing With Guilt as a Single Christian

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Many single Christians have told us that dealing with guilt is one of the biggest drains on their personal relationships, self-esteem and spiritual lives. The bottom line is that inappropriately dealing with guilt can destroy our lives and those around us.

Top Areas Where We Are Dealing With Guilt

Dealing with guilt as a single person can come from many different areas of our lives.

Dealing with Guilt in our Dating Relationships

This is a biggie. Many Christians walk around with this heavy burden of guilt because they are allowing sexual impurity in their dating lives. I know I am speaking to some who are weary (hey, I’ve been there, done that) of all the double-mindedness, but can’t quite get up the strength to turn around. So they live with guilt like a millstone tied around their necks, and it’s chokng every bit of spiritual joy out their lives. Sound vaguely familiar?

Other takes on dealing with guilt in dating relationships include:

• Remaining in a relationship include remaining in a liaison that you know you should have never entered in the first place. For example, Dating an unbeliever and all that goes along with that.
• Remaining in a relationship for all the wrong reasons such as convenience or fear over how the other person may react to the news that you’re breaking up with them.

Dealing With the Guilt of Being Single

Much of this guilt is hoisted upon us by those misguided but well meaning friends, family and church members who insist on wanting to to know why we (The great catches that we are!) are still single after all these years.

Not a few singles have gotten quite pissed off at others for pointing out their continued single state. For this reason, many singles avoid church events that are flush with married couples, and holiday celebrations where the topic will most likely come up.

Dealing With Guilt as a Single Parent

In the US alone, there are 13 million single parents living with their children. Many of these are Christian single parents who deal with guilt in so many different areas of their lives:

• Guilt over getting a divorce or having a child out of wedlock
• Guilt over not being able to provide better for the children
• Guilt over even taking a few hours away from the children to go on a date. And that’s only the tip of the iceberg. there are many other potential areas a single parent dating may be be tempted to feel guilty.

How to Deal with Guilt

Understand What Guilt Means

Guilt literally means “delinquency” or “culpability”. If you ask the average person on the street what guilt means they will say it’s a feeling they get when they feel like they,ve done something wrong.

Therefore, it’s important to identify the source of your guilt to determine if it is really appropriate for you to feel this way, or if you’re dealing with what we call false guilt. As Christians we need to remember that Satan , also known as the Accuser, specializes in putting believers on false guilt trips. If you are dealing with inappropriate guilt, you need to claim God’s promises found in Romans 8: “There is no condemnation now for those in Christ Jesus.”

Learn to Forgive Yourself

If you are dealing with guilt deemed appropriate, remember you need to forgive yourself just as Christ has forgiven you. Do I need to repeat 1 John 1:9?: “If we confess our sins (guilt) He is faithful and just to forgive us and cleanse us from all unrighteousness.” How amazing is that!

Jesus IS your peace, and He has actually made peace with your past screw ups. Don’t allow the enemy to bring you back to something that’s been washed away. Okay?

Are you a Christian single dealing with guilt? Feel free to share your burdens with us.

Related Post:

Alcohol Use and Abuse with Single Christians

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