Forgiveness and Dating Relationships
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There is an amazing connection between forgiveness and healing in the Bible. Forgiveness has amazing benefits. Forgiveness can heal broken relationships, broken hearts and even bring health to one’s body. Only recently have secular psychologists and doctors begun speaking of the healing power of forgiveness in one’s life.
The Forgiveness Problem
Many Christian singles have problems with their health and the relationships in their lives because they have a major issue with forgiveness. For example, some singles have had such sour dating relationships with cheaters and patholigical liars that they now find it hard to grant forgiveness. Others walk around gloomy and depressed because they they can’t forgive themselves for past sex sins that God has long forgiven.
Are you a single Christian today in need of forgiveness for how you treated someone in the past? Remember Jesus suffered for all your wrongdoing. If He says he has forgiven you (1 John 1:9), in faith you need to forgive yourself. Is there someone seeking your forgiveness, but you just can’t open up to that person? Jesus says forgive, and you shall be forgiven. (Luke 6:37).
I really hope you don’t think I’m preaching to you. Why? Because lately a whole bunch of people have been ticking off to the point where I have had a difficult time forgiving them. So I’ll make a deal with you. You pray for me and I’ll pray for you, okay?
Bible Verse of the Day
“Bear with each other and forgive whatever grievances you may have against one another. Forgive as the Lord forgave you.” Colossians 3:13
Feel free to share your views on relationships and forgiveness.
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Thankfulness and Being Single
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Thanksgiving Day is a time of thankfulness and being thankful for all our blessings. However, for many singles it’s simply another holiday to survive, and a reminder of how lonely and frustrating life can be without the emotional and physical intimacy of a mate. That’s why showing thankfulness is difficult for many of my Christian single friends, especially during this time of year. Do you feel the same way?
A Tradition of Thankfulness
In answer to this need, each year we usually have a big Thanksgiving Day feast at my house for unattached singles. One of the highlights is that in between stuffing our faces with turkey and anything else not walking off the table, we would share our thankfulness for what God has done in our live the past year.
Thankfulness is a hard thing to fake. But ever so slowly, trickles of thankfulness would pour out of hearts, some of which were heartbroken, and spirit of rejoicing would begin. The feeling would be the same one would get when the warm sun starts breaking through the clouds on a somber day.
Thankfulness Observations for Single Christians
Listen I haven’t figured out all this thankfulness stuff yet, but here are some things I have observed:
- We are commanded of the Lord to show thankfulness with a grateful heart.
- Thankfulness in our hearts unleashes the power of God in our lives, because it lets God and the Enemy know we trust and believe in His power and provision, come hell or high water.
- Thankfulness means we’ve made peace with our past, and are content in our present circumstances. Unthankful folks are constantly referring to past “what ifs and if onlys”. What a drag!
- People who show thankfulness spread a contagious spirit of faith and joy to others. I guess that’s why God wants us to show thankfulness. These thankful souls are able trust God for big things in the future.
We said earlier it’s hard to fake thankfulness. Yet God tells us to be thankful. Are you feeling unthankful this day because of your present circumstances of being single or any other issues going on in your life?
Here’s what we do at our yearly feast:
- Get out a piece of paper and begin listing everything (and we mean everything!) you can show thankfulness for in your life. You may feel this a lame idea and not likely to work. Don’t let those negative feelings to control you.
- As you list your blessings, think about what God has to bring about each one.
- Begin to thank and worship Him for who He is, and let Him minister to your heart.
Bible Verse of Day
And whatever you do, whether in word or deed, do it all in the name of the Lord Jesus, giving thanks to God the Father through Him.
Colossians 3:17
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Child Support Payments and Christian Single Parents
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Receiving child support payments is a major worry for Christian single parents, who often struggle to keep their kids well fed and clothed. It’s no wonder then that custodial single parents rank collecting child support payments ahead of concerns like single parent dating with kids. Of course, when it comes to child support payments, these single parents are not alone.
Skirting Child Support Payments: A Worldwide Problem
According to ACES (The Association for Children for Enforcement of Support) only half of US custodial single parents who are supposed to receive child support payments actually do so. Folks, that’s a lot of deadbeat dads and moms getting away without paying child support. And I suspect these numbers on child support payments in places like the UK, Australia and Canada are similar.
Child Support Payment Enforcement
Many non-custodial parents get away without worrying about having to make child support payments because the party who has residential custody simply gives up trying to collect in family court.
Family court can be a scary, stressful, frustrating , money wasting and time consuming proposition. I should know, because I have worked there for over two ( oh my Lord!) decades. But it’s the only system we have, and can be used for good if you know to do it.
Therefore, if you are a Christian single parent at your wit’s end over getting child support payments, please don’t give up to discouragement and depression Let me instead suggest a positive course of action:
Educate Yourself
Get to know your rights regarding child support payments and the family law in your area. The following sites offer some great resources:
In the UK: www.csa.gov.uk/
In the US: www.acf.hhs.gov/programs/cse/index.html
In Canada: www.justice.gc.ca/en/ps/sup/
In Australia: www.csa.gov.au/
Take action by filing a child support enforcement complaint
If you don’t find satisfaction with child support payments through the courts alone, there are private companies who can help you and the court track down the deadbeat. Here are a few off the top of my head:
NationalChildSupport.com
SupportKids.com
SupportCollectors.com
While most of these do not charge up front fees, they will catch charge between 30 and 50% of the recouped child support payments. Pray about wether this makes sense for you.
Remember The Promises Of God’s Provision
Ultimately, human agencies are not the answer for your needs. Remember, your saviour, Jesus, will never leave you nor forsake you. Your Heavenly Father knows what you need, and promises to provide for you and the kids. So if the child support payments don’t come in, let’s believe Him together that he will provide what you and the kids need some other way. Okay?
Bible Verse of the Day
“I was young and now I am old,
yet I have never seen the righteous forsaken
or their children begging bread. They are always generous and lend freely; their children will be blessed.”
Psalm 37:25,36
Are you a Christian single parent with something to share about child support payments?
