Romantic Christian Singles?
4 CommentsDoes the term romantic Christian singles shake you one way or the other? Several Christians I have bumped into recently, curiously all married, have told me that they feel it is a ‘sin” for Christian singles to be romantic. So what do you think? Is the term “romantic Christian single” an oxymoron? Does entertaining romantic thoughts as a Christian make one prone to sinful behavior? Kind of like stoking the fires, setting one up for sexual sin?
Bible Verse of the Day
“As a man thinks, so he is.” Proverbs 23:7
Christian Views on Abortion
3 CommentsThere are a number of Christian views on abortion. Do oyu have a Christian view on abortion? As a Christian single, have you, or would you ever consider an abortion? Do you even have a well thought out Christian view on abortion? Having own biblical view on abortion, dating and pre-marital sex can help save you from making some very bad and painful decisions in your dating life, as the following email we received from a sister in the Lord shows.
The following is a personal story of a Christian single girl who ended up getting an abortion. Instead of judging her, I ask that you pray for her, and write her with your encouragement and advice. I am not compromising her identity, but only sharing an email address because she is seeking help form other single Christians:
“I dated this guy for almost two years. Everything was almost perfect throughout. We even prayed and went to church together. However we knew we were still struggling with premarital sex and tried to abstain from this. Well, it wasn’t to long before I became pregnant this spring and did the unthinkable as a Christian women.
I am still struggling trying to forgive myself and was hoping that the guy would comfort me through my personal struggle. He only neglected me and started cheating on me (of which he was doing the entire time in our relationship without me knowing). I felt betrayed and angry. I tried to be the best woman I could be throughout our relationship but he still hurt me and cheated on me behind my back.
He eventually told me he didn’t love me anymore and broke up with me in April. I thought real true love sticks by you whether you are right or wrong. I know that I was wrong in having an abortion and I pray every day that God forgives me. But how can someone that told me they would marry me and would stick by me always, leave me in the worst state of my entire life? How can God let me still be in love with him when I continue to “pray without ceasing” that He destroy my feelings for this guy?
The guy is is out dating someone else and is happy not thinking about what I am going through, BUT I am trying to stay single to work on my relationship with God and to practice abstinence to prevent history from repeating itself. Why do I have to still hurt especially when I am trying to be a doer of the work instead of a hearer? I am so depressed right now that I can’t even think. My Christian brothers and sisters, someone, please explain this!
Bible Verse of Day:7.30.09
~And that is what some of you were. But you were washed, you were sanctified, you were justified in the name of the Lord Jesus Christ and by the Spirit of our God~1 Corinthians 6:11
Masturbation and Christian Singles
140 Comments
Let’s talk about the M word and Christian singles. Male masturbation. Female masturbation. Adolescent masturbation. Chronic masturbation. Is it a sin to masturbate? Are you feeling uncomfortable yet? Most churches apparently are because they avoid the masturbation topic as well as Osama bin Laden evades captivity. This is a little ironic, to say the least, when survey after survey reveals a majority of single Christians of all different ages (guys and gals) have masturbated.
As a Christian single, just what are your feelings about masturbation? Are you a masturbator? Do you struggle with your Christian Lifestyle because you feel it is morally wrong? Do you live in guilt and confusion over the whole issue?
Personally, I can’t stand it when Christian teachers are so dogmatic on the “rights” and “wrongs” of masturbatory activities because it’s such a complex issue, with many different contingencies connected to the practice. So I’ll try to leave my preaching in the pulpit as I share from my heart some observations and Scriptures to help guide you through this sensitive issue.
Masturbation Observations
- The Bible is silent on the issue of masturbation even though the vast majority of humankind is preoccupied with it.
- The Roman Catholic Church, some Protestant denominations and even Webster’s Dictionary have attempted to equate the sin of Onan (Genesis 38:6-10) with masturbation, but a simple exegesis of these passages precludes this possibility. You see, under Jewish law, a person was required to procreate with his brother’s widow. When Onan refused out of selfishness, the Lord killed him. The bottom line here? God did not whack Onan for whacking off, but rather for “spilling his seed” by ejaculating outside of his dead brother’s wife during sexual intercourse.
- Many Christian singles and not a few Christian pastors feel masturbation to orgasm is acceptable in order to: 1) relieve unabated sexual tension, and/or 2) to avoid sexual immorality. The catch is that there should be no lustful thoughts connected to the act.
- The vast majority of single Christians feel that compulsive masturbation, simply for the purpose of self gratification, is always wrong. Most would also agree that habitual masturbation while single will make it harder for any future spouse to please them sexually.
Notwithstanding the above points, let the following paraphrased verses guide you as you pray and seek the Lord over whether masturbating should have any room in your life as a single person:
- Matthew 5:28- Looking lustily at a woman (or a man if you’re a woman) means you are commiting adultery in your heart.
- 1 Corinthians 6:12- All things are lawful for you, but not all things are profitable.
- 1Corinthians 6:19,20- Your body is the temple of the Holy Spirit, and so you should glorify God with it.
- 1 Thessalonians 4:4,5- You should learn to control your body in a holy and honourable way, not in passionate lust like the heathens.
- 2 Peter 2:19- You are a slave to whatever has mastered you.
- James 4:17- If you know you should do something, but fail to do it, it’s sin.
Finally, if you are a Christian who is really beating yourself up over the issue of masturbation, or are struggling with sexual impurity, remember that Jesus offers forgiveness (1 John 1:9) you and loves you where you are. Also consider the words of James Dobson of Focus on the Family:
“It is my opinion that masturbation is not much of an issue with God. It does not cause disease. It does not produce babies, and Jesus did not mention it in the Bible. I’m not telling you to masturbate, and I hope you won’t feel the need for it. But if you do, it is my opinion that you should not struggle with guilt over it.”
