Broken Hearted: How to Mend a Broken Heart
How to mend a broken heart for singles who are broken hearted?
Almost everyone has had their own “broken heart confession” of a lost relationship. A broken heart is a broken heart, whether that relationship was in a dating context or a marriage. All I can say is it’s one of the most painful things I’ve ever suffered.
While mending a broken heart takes different amounts of time for each person, the following points on how to mend a broken heart will be helpful to all single Christians.
How to Mend a Broken Heart Guide
Talk About Your Broken Heart With Those Who Care
One of the best ways to begin mending a broken heart is to talk about it. Talking about our pain helps us accept the reality of the situation, and guides us along in the healing process and dealing with guilt, if any
As Christian singles, the first person we should go to is the Lord. A beautiful promise is found in Psalms 34:18: “The Lord is close to the brokenhearted and saves those who are crushed in spirit.” Tell your heavenly Dad where it hurts, and exactly how you feel. Don’t hold back anything because He is there for you, and can take whatever you throw at Him.
Beyond pouring out your broken heart to the Lord, getting involved in a Christian singles group, church fellowship, or support group will give you a safe place to share your painful experiences and receive love and support. Don’t feel that you can heal or mend your broken heart on your own. That’s just stupid pride, and will cause you to take longer to heal. We all need somebody from time to time.
Forgiveness Equals Healing
There is an amazing amount of healing power in being forgiven, or in granting forgiveness to someone who has wronged you. The power of forgiveness began at the cross of Christ, where He forgave us our sins. If you don’t understand what it means to be forgiven by God, please read how you can find peace with Him before continuing.
Forgiveness brings closure and cleansing, which speeds the healing of the broken hearted person. So if you wronged someone in a previous dating or marriage relationship, ask forgiveness. Whatever the other party does with that offer is not yours to worry about.
On the other hand, if someone has wronged you, don’t seek revenge (that’s the Lord’s to handle), but forgive from the heart. It doesn’t mean that you have now become a doormat for further abuse. Granting forgiveness to someone who has broken your heart does mean that you have decided to let go of the past and start a new beginning in your life.
Take Care of Your Body
Having a broken heart puts tremendous stress on your physical and emotional wellbeing. That’s why it’s important to eat right, drink plenty of fluids, exercise and find time for relaxation. Force yourself to do these things, even if you don’t feel like it, and it will help you overcome depression and feelings of low self-esteem. You’ll thank me later if you do.
Be Willing To Take Another Risk
Okay, your relationship didn’t work out, and you’ve been left with a broken heart. So take this time to evaluate where you can improve yourself for the future.
As a broken hearted single trying to mend, you are in a vulnerable state. That’s why you definitely want to avoid the dangers of a rebound relationship. This is especially true if you are a single parent dating with kids.
However, please don’t close yourself off to the possibility of romance. In the right time and place it’s a wonderful thing. In this regard, you may want to consider using an online Christian dating service because it’s a great way to ease back into dating on your terms, and at your own pace.
Are you a single woman or man with any additional advice on how to mend a broken heart?
Related Articles:
Dating After Divorce
Dating Advice: When to Dump a Dating Relationship
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Dear Denise:
Sorry that this took so long to get back. Please know that we have been praying for you. Our hearts go out to you in your need. Jesus is REALLY the healer of broken hearts.
Please know that Jesus looks at your heart, and forgives you completely. He feels and knows your pain, and is here for you.
If you would like to talk we our here for you…This is our ministry…If you want a referral please let us know that too, and we will help in that area.
I’ve been through with so many relationships and all of them hurt me so bad. All my ex-boyfriends had cheated on me. I dont understand why my relationships never succeed, and on the other hand, all my ex-boyfriends were married and happy with their family. I wonder why I cant be happy…Please help me!
Dear Sweet Daisy:
You are not to blame that men cheated on you…Go to the Lord even through teasr, and He will meet your needs…He promises! if you need a referral to a great singles group in your area…please let us know..
David
Dear Sweet Daisy:
You are not to blame that men cheated on you…Go to the Lord even through tears, and He will meet your needs…He promises! if you need a referral to a great singles group in your area…please let us know..
David
i had a relationship with a guy who was older than me 10 years gap. He cheated on me, we had one kid and I am raising her alone.and with my own support…
I had an affair with someone else’s fiance and we have been together for about 2 years. He left his fiancee for me and had proposed to me but i’m terrified that he would cheat on me like what he did to his fiancee. I finally had the courage to put the relationship to an end but it’s hurting me so badly… am i doing the right thing? pls help me..
He got on his knees, and cried. He told me he loved me, and that he wanted to marry me. I’m tired and weak and sometimes feel like just dying. He just left me without saying good-bye. My heart is shattered into many pieces!!!!!!!!!!!
David,
This is Marie Yolanda…I didnt get reply on my comment on last Sunday…I e-mailed Helen in My Space to expose the person she is pregnant with now..but she has not read it yet…
i was living with my boyfriend and all of a sudden , he said he sees me as a room mate so he can have relationships with other women. I am a Christian and I want to live holy in Gods sight, he just wants to live together and do whatever he wants. Please pray for me, that God will help me and change this situation, I love him a lot, but I love Jesus more. Brokenhearted and hurting in Houston, Texas
I was recently engaged (shortly) to a guy who was my best friend of 5 years and we have to children together. Well after much longing praying, God’s answer for us was no. God revealed this man’s heart to me and it wasn’t the heart I thought I knew. My brokenness comes from feeling as if I have invested in something that no longer exists, my son is being raised by a single parent, and the devastation I feel knowing that he is still seeing the woman he cheated on me with and all the while sending me love poems and telling me he wants our family back. Knowing the truth about someone doesn’t make the pain go away.
My boyfriend cheated on me. We were together for 1 year and 5 months. Now, i just knew that he had an affair with another girl when we’re 3 months in a relationship. the girl got pregnant and delivered her baby girl. I was betrayed and felt bad. I don’t know how to react I have mix emotions. i don’t know how to deal with this. This is the second time a man betrayed and fooled me. Don’t i deserve to be happy once and for all?
Dear Bluesky:
A broken heart is NEVER easy to deal with, and we have many praying for you. I firmly believe God will lead you to the right person, as long as you follow His will, and not your own. In order to avoid another broken heart, we suggest seeking out trusted Christian advice from friends who know you well before making another dating decision. God bless you and hang in there. You are worth it!
I’m a Christian and my is boyfriend is the son of a pastor. We have been together for 4 years but recently just this month he told me he got another girl pregnant, and I am hurting until now because he is my first bf and I thought he will be my last. What is the right thing for me to do? He said I am the one he really loves, and that he was just tempted. How can I forget him? Should I accept him again? I’m really confuse, please help. Do you think it’s better if I move on now?
I HAVE BEEN HURT ONCE IN A RELATIONSHIP.I PRAYED FOR THE HEALING.BUT FROM THEN NO ONE HAS EVER COME ON MY WAY.AM A FAITHFUL SERVANT HAVE PRAYED AND FASTED,REPENTED OF KNOWN AND UNKNOWN SINS YET NO ANSWER FOR A GODLY SPOUSE AM WONDERING DID GOD COMPLETELY FORGOT ME. PLEASE HELP AM DESPARATE FOR GOD TO ANSWER
My ex-fiance broke up with me and I found out just recently that after we broke up he slept with this girl whom I suspected before that he was cheating on me with but swears he stopped talking to after I found out about them talking and now got her pregnant. He still tells me I am his true love. Even calls me his wife. He says he never meant for this to happen and he was actually getting ready to move back with me when he found out this girl got pregnant. Now it feels that my world was crushed. I am devastated and very hurt. How do you deal with this??
Dear Jea:
We are praying for your broken heart…The Lord is the Great Healer so you are in good hands. If your cheating boyfriend did this to you before you are married, do you really think he would be faithful in marriage? I think you know what to do.
Kelly:
We know that waiting on God is never easy, but always worth. Please hang in there, because He really does make all things beautiful in His time..In the meantime, check out the advice in the above link.
Praying for you,
David
((((Dear God, I Pray for Broken Hearts, To Be Healed. God I do not know how fix broken heart, But you do Jesus… In The Name Of jesus Christ I Pray. Amen)) Pray for a Revival. Please pray for my safety. Please pray for the USA. Please keep praying for my Families,Friends and Neighbors.
I’m so broken hearted right now that I can barely even breath. I stood side by side with my girlfriend for 18 months while her son underwent chemotherapy for his cancer. I loved this woman and always ensure she had a home to lay her head and food for her and her child to eat. I caught her cheating and the sad part is that she had her brother tell me that me and her were over. She didn’t even have the decency to say thank you. I’ve been sick throwing up and not eating for the last 4 days. It pains me to write this. I am a man I am suppose to be much stronger than this. I gave this woman half of what I had. And the only reason I say half is because we were not married yet. I’m completely devastated and I don’t know how to move on.
Mrs. Terry- What a beautiful prayer!
Dear Broken Hearted:
My heart goes out to you! Remember, there is no burden to great Jesus can not heal. He is close to the broken hearted because those are the kinds of folks He is looking for. Those are not just word but the living truth. If you have accepted Christ Jesus as Lord and Saviour, I’m going to ask you to surrender all of this to Him Leave it with Him, everything, and let’s see what our God can do. We are praying for you. Sounds like you may need to talk to someone for encouragement and perspective on your broken heart. Email us and we will contact you.
David
I met my ex-fiance off of a Christian dating site. I believed with all of my heart that he was my soulmate. We shared the same passion for God, the same thirst for His Truth, and many, many interests. I never felt so connected to a man in my life. We had a long distance relationship, which was pure bliss. We wanted to do everything God’s way and we put Him first in our relationship. Then he moved from his state to be close to me. We got engaged. Things began to crumble immediately. It didn’t take long for me to realize that he was very selfish, defensive, and worst of all, dishonest. I was so crushed. Praise Jesus for showing me the meaning of Christlike Love and thank God for removing the blinders from my eyes. And now I just trust in Him to heal my broken heart…
Dear Bella:
I am so sorry. We are praying for your broken heart.
Hi, I am broken hearted with my first boyfriend (my only boyfriend)..We were engaged.. . He broke me up for not so valid reasons…. I ‘ve experienced great pain that I wanted to die. My life is not the same anymore..I am also a Christian but because of that pain, It made me a different person, it made me bitter. The worst thing is that my life was destroyed…..It’s hard for me to trust guys anymore…especially Christian guys…Just last month we talked and found out that ever since we broke up he don’t have any girlfriend and told me that he had regrets when he left me…I never had a boyfriend after he left…Even though I am so hard, I still prayed to God for His will…Pls. help me…e-mail me if possible…I really need Godly advice. I know God will use you..
Please help me cause iI’m so broken hearted cause my girl friend and i broke up I love here so much, but iIdont know what to do please help me. Thanks. I hope God listens to my prayer.
Dear ValeyRose:
We recommend going together for Christian counseling. You can find one on this site. I am praying for you, and remember..God builds on the ashes…Your life is not destroyed after a broken heart.
Dear James:
eMail us for one on one help.
My fiance just recently went to Europe backpacking with a mate. He really was the man of my dreams, I knew that he was something special and I trusted him completely. I was a little unsure of him going only 4 months before our wedding but he assured me that I could completely trust him and he would never do anything to hurt me. However 2 and a half weeks into the trip I got a call from him telling me that he did something he really regretted. He told me that he had ended up going to a strip club and became quite intimate with a boy. I was shocked, I never expected that from him, we had been dating for over 6 years and I knew that he was not like that. Anyway he told me he was going to come home straight away because he felt so bad. So he came back, but only to tell me that it went further and that they actually had sex. I was so shocked. We were both virgins and waiting for our wedding night. I am so hurt. I dont know what to do. I love him so much and I want to forgive him but I dont know how to forget what he’s done. I keep on thinking about it and ive become so depressed. He has promised me that he will NEVER do anything like that again. It is now 3 months before our wedding and I really dont know what to do. I love him so much but the hurt is so bad. Should we still get married or getout of it before its too late.
Dear Kelly,
It is not easy to let things rest in God’s hands sometimes. In a book Experiencing the Depths of Jesus Christ I found something helpful for me. Jeanne Guyon, the author asks “If this were to be your lot for the rest of your life, what would you do?” Then she says, “Do this”. In another section of the book she says to “Accept the matter”. “Give yourself up to him as a sacrifice”. If you can do this, it helps make it easier to bear. Trust the Lord that he has your best interest at heart. He understands the “you” deep inside and knows what you need. Go to him in prayer and cry if you need to. I find that tears speak the words in my heart that I often can’t express. And I know he understands. Know that accepting this as If it were your lot for the rest of your life does not mean that it Will be that. I will pray for your acceptance of this, and for the ability to leave it in his hands. May God bless you in your surrendering.
Thanks for that post, Laura…great advice for broken hearts.
I am 37 and have been unable to get over a relationship that ended almost a year ago. I’ve had lots of failed relationships before this one but I feel like the heartache from this one will never end. I’ve spent the last year trying to get closer to God and reading dozens of Christian books and praying about taking my desire for this person away but I don’t feel any closer to healing and the pain still hurts so bad I don’t know how to get over it and feel at peace. And I know Christ as my Lord and Savior so this makes me feel like I have no hope in Him. It took me 35 years to meet a man that I ever felt attracted to like that and love for and I fear I’ll never feel that way again. As I write this I feel like I must sound like a pathetic teenager and yet I can’t get past this as a grown woman. Please God help me.
The ratio of broken relationships have increased at a frightening rate past years. I ,too am suffering from a broken heart.My GF walked out on me &has been dating the guy I suspected &even till today she lies to me she isnt dating anyone.Jesus can heal our hearts, He is the one who gave us Love for our partners& I pray for all the broken hearted that God’s amazing,all sufficing Love is poured into each one of our hearts that all our pain&emptiness disappear..In Jesus’ name.Amen.
My boyfriend of three years stopped loving me after I got very ill with pneumonia and I am broken hearted. I have been unemployed and unable to cope for 2 years now. I was beautiful, intelligent and precious. Now I am a wreck and my health is declining and I can’t cope…He said today that he didn’t love me. I can’t believe it he was my prince and angel! Virginia
Amen Michael!
Dear Virginia:
I am so sorry about your broken heart! If it has been two years that you can’t cope due to your broken heart, maybe you need to speak with a counselor? We can make a referral if you wish. Do you know Jesus as your Saviour? In Scripture it says he is close to the brokenhearted. And remember: No man is worth what pain you are going through.
We are praying for your healing.
i have been married for 23 months and is currently going through a divorce because of spouse abuse, with her being the abuser, i am deeply hurt over this and was willing to go to counseling but my spouse refuses to go. so i have no choice but to proceed with the divorce, i still love her and wanna help her, but i can’t fix this by myself please advise
i have been dating my girlfriend for about 4 years and after we graduate i went to a different sch from her. about 8 months after i got into my new sch i found out that she had been seeing another guy. i never ever thought of that such things will happen though she got mentioned to me quite often that there is this guy and stuff they talk about, i never had suspect anything because i really trusted her completely. but after i found out that she cheated on me that was really a big big blow i don know what to do. that guy emailed me and said ’since u love her so much i think u should know about this, i masturbated her and she did the same to me’ i m really shocked to know that. i qn her at first she said she didn even kiss him, but as it got longer i asked and asked and she said the most they got to was that guy touching her ‘there’ with a skirt on. though i still have that bit of trust on her but i keep dwell on the words of that guy. when i think of him masturbating her i really cant take it. i don know if its true. but we are still together. it really bothers me a lot. i put my prob to God but some how the imagine always flashes back to me during some part of the day and i will really feel very miserable. pls email me or reply me here.
To all: My girlfriend broke up with me last night after youth at are church. she said the reason was because she had given her whole heart to me and wanted it to be with God only. She believed that if she breaks up with me she will give ALL of her heart to God and cant have me apart of it. She still has feelings for me and so do I for her but we just don’t know what to do. Please help.
Please Please contact me at M3-Euro@hotmail.com
It sounds like your fiance is gay. I mean bad enough that he cheated on you, but he did it with a guy. I understand if you want to forgive him because everyone makes mistakes…but are won’t you wonder in the future that he might not be into girls and is just using you. Common on he had sex with a guy get a clue you don’t belong in that relationship!!!!!
Dear Darius:
I getting you and her to discuss the topic of what it means to “love the Lord above all” with your youth pastor or other trusted elder. When we love the Lord we can love others even better as well. Has she made your her idol?
John:
The pain you are experiencing is one reason why it’s not God’s plan for you to have sex before marriage. What she has done is wrong, and I feel your pain, but she does not belong to you.
My husband move out of our home. He said it’s God’s will for him to do that. Over a year ago he was having an affair with someone in our church and she got pregnant. I took him back. Ever since then our marriage has not been the same what to do.
I just broke up with my girlfriend of 15 months. We broke up because my parents didn’t approve of and her family. Theres loads of other variables involved which I wont get into now, but what matters is that i wasn’t my choice. I was given the choice between staying with her and getting chucked out of my house and cutting all ties with my family or ending the relationship. I don’t know whether ill ever be able to tell her the reason why. It hurt so bad when i told her that I even fainted. We were sat out in the for nearly 3 hours sobbing in each others arms. My heart feels like its broken in two.
I just pray that God will be able to mend my broken heart and if its mean to be then its meant to be.
Ive been 1 year with my girlfriend, I love her so much i can’t explain it, my GF cheated on me on 1 Year Anniversary, I almost died. I have so much hate now for this women, that she destroyed everything, I know it’s wrong to hate, but I’m so devastated. She started begging me to forgive her, which I can not and never will. My pain is so intense, I need help please!!!
What does not kill us makes us stronger. Hang in there!
I’m single, and although I’m glad I’ve been single up to this point (36) because it’s given me time to find out who I am on my own, I’ve felt for some time that a good, healthy, passionate, loving, committed relationship with a Christian guy is not going to happen for me. I’m not putting out negative, angry vibes, I enjoy my life on my own but this is a real longing I feel that just gets more painful with time. All the pat “Christian” answers (Don’t worry, honey, Jesus is working through this!) only hurt. At this point, I don’t fell any joy at all in my faith and I just feel like God likes to play head games….if I’m meant to be single, fine, but for crying out loud why won’t he take this desire away? Please, no one tell me it’s to bring me closer to him. It just feels numb when I hear those canned answers that are supposed to make me feel better
I am brokenhearted: I was going out with this girl I fell in love with. She proposed I said yes,then we went to visit her and she cheated on me with my best friend. I’ve been going crazy everyday Ii can’t live with her and can’t live with out her any advice?
Susan…God is NOT into head games. If I were you I would get into group counseling (Christian) and work through these legit issues. We are praying for you…and that’s not a canned answer.
Jess: Of course you can live without this jerk! She will just damage your broken heart more if you attempt to get back. Please surround yourself with Christian singles who really care, and let them minister to you, okay?
I am brokenhearted. No one is wrong. she just make her choices. but it is painful. I want to release her and not getting bitter. But the bitterness is very hard to let go. I need help n prayer
I need help with my broken heart and how to mend it. It has been about four months since my ex bf broke up with me. He broke my heart - but-I haven’t had a day go by when I haven’t thought of him. He can be such a cruel person, talking about girls he wants to be with and girls he has been with since me. I feel ill when I see him. I just wish I hadn’t fallen at all…. he has torn me down
But I really need to move on and get over this?
I need to pick up the pieces of my broken heart…
but this situation has made me a whole lot stronger… everyone with a broken heart should hang in there.
Somebody please help me with my brokenheart. Ive broken up multiple times. Thanks to this my heart is broken and aches and I feel like useless waste in this world. I do not know why but I can not seem to shake off the sadness, heartache pain and torment. Everyday I can only think about how I will be rejected again and again; I feel like there is no one out there for me… no one to love and be loved back…no girl who will want to have me for a bf… why? I dont understand, Im confused and alone please help me in this v_v Im slowly losing all hope in love and romance
This is about broken hearts: I have been involved with a guy for 14 years. He decided to tell me after coming back into my life for the 2nd time that he was still not certain of his love for me. I’m hurting from a broken heart so bad, just as I started to want to try to trust him he pulls this. He has been leaving town a lot to go to his sons basketball games in PA, on the weekends never asking me to go with him and then getting upset if I call before he gets back just to see where he is and how long it will take for him to get home. Please pray for me my spirit and heart has been broken so many times by this guy. He just does not care and I have a broken heart.
Dear readers,
Its just a week he left me for a very valid reason. My guts keep telling me that he will change his mind, but the other part of me saying better to let go of him. God knows how much i deeply love him. We were so close until i cant face my days without him but i force myself to get rid of him. I busy myself, i meet alots of friend, i create hobbies, and i prayed alots until im not sure whether God is listening and feel the pain i gone through. im so weak i fall again. i feel like dying. im so empty…anyone please help me. im so helpless.
My heart is broken. My fiancee of two years just left me for reasons i don’t know .He didn’t break up just stopped picking my calls and avoiding me for over 4 months.I hurt too much .I am not desperate but i need to know what i did .I still love him and this hurts me more because he doesnt seem he is ever coming back.I feel like my self esteem has come crashing.Am a good Christian but instead of praying i cry ever nite .Can anyone who has gone through this help me heal? i want to be free. i want to love again because i seem to have closed my heart to all men. I am brokenhearted
How to mend a broken heart? i met this guy..at first i tried myself not to fall for him. i knew he had a long time girlfriend for 7years but things keep going..we hanged out every week but it all ended one day when i found out that he still loves his girl friend in the other country…i was so hurt its like he just using me but he kept on telling me he’s not that kind of person. the pain is killing me..how did all of this happen..i’m so depressed…my heart is broken..i couldn’t even eat and sleep..i really had a hard time moving on..i used to talk to him every hour minutes but now no body i could lean on..im so lonely will you help me?? it hurt so much specially this my first..please help me with my brokenheart..i’m begging u all
I finally got a boyfriend at the age of 20, he was my first everything and i was his first everything we were together for 3 years and he broke up with me? i dont know if i should try to get back with him or if i should let him go. the thing i fear is that how could i share myself with someone else and know if he is the right person. i dont know the whole reason why her broke up with me, but i find myself praying to god to help heal his heart and mine so that we may get back together but everyday my prayer goes un-answered, and i find myself hurting even more, and i know that if i ask in jesus’s name i will recieve, and that god does answers prayers, i just have to be patient, but as the days go by i am more upset then hopeful. what do i do?
to all broken hearted same as me…there is always a good reason behind all this things,let us move foreward to be a better person…continue to live..God is so good,He will not give us somthing we connot endure..live one at a time and lets us enjoy the pain..one we find ourselves happy and so inlove again…
My friend…..Whom i thought I can start a relationship with…turned me down because she didn’t feel there is no physcial bond between us…have u ever heard of such a thing????is that a necessity…(I’ve never been involved this much…emotionally ever)
My boyfriend of 4 years engaged me and cheated on me 2months into our engagament. I wanted to forgive him and let us continue. He told me we should move on. But I kept on reminding him of the hurt. He then decided to end the relationship without any reason. I am still hurt but would like to move on with my life.