受虐待的关系的迹象，提示为受虐待单在约会关系

Abusive Relationships-Are You Dating an Abuser?虐待关系-你约会一施虐者？ (share?) （份额？）

虐待关系

Abusive relationships are not uncommon among虐待关系并不少见，其中 dating single Christians约会单身基督徒 . 。 Some singles have been in an abusive relationship, and know the pain that goes with it.一些单打已在一个受虐待的关系，并且知道痛苦随它。 Sadly, other single Christians reading this article right now are presently in an abusive relationship, but may not know it or be in denial over it.可悲的是，其他单一基督徒读此文章的权利，现在目前在一个受虐待的关系，但可能不知道它，或在拒绝权。

While in the rest of this article we will designate the victim as a “she”, over 10% of abusive relationships consist of women against men.而在本文的其余部分，我们会候任受害人作为一个“她” ，超过10 ％的虐待关系构成的妇女对男性的。 Abusive relationships come in all sizes and shapes, which at times could make it difficult to realize you or one of your friends are actually in one.虐待关系来在所有大小和形状，有时可以使人们难以实现您或您的朋友，其实是在一。 Would you know it if you were dating an abuser?你会知道它，如果你约会一施虐者？

Abusive Dating Relationships Are About Power and Control虐待约会的关系，大约有权力和控制

The victim of an abusive relationship may suffer one or more of the following forms of abuse:受害者一受虐待的关系可能遭受的一个或多个下列形式的虐待：

Abusive Relationships and Isolation 虐待关系和隔离

In an abusive relationship the abuser is在一个受虐待的关系施虐者是 obsessively possessive and jealous煞费苦心占有和嫉妒 .He has tight reigns on what the victim does, where she goes or who she talks to on the cell phone.他已紧绌的时期就什么受害者的，在那里她去或谁她会谈，就手机。

Abusive Relationships and Emotional Attacks 虐待关系和情感攻击

The abusive dating partner will often make the other party feel inept, stupid or crazy.虐待约会的伙伴，往往会令另一方觉得无能，愚蠢或疯狂。 He accomplishes this through manipulative words or acions.他完成这项透过操控的字词或acions 。 He may accomplish this through putdowns about her appearance or intelligence.他可能做到这一点，通过putdowns对她的外貌或情报。 He may also inexplicably withdraw affection, using it as a weapon.他也可能莫名其妙地撤回的感情，用它作为一种武器。 All of this wreaks havoc on the abused’s所有这一切都wreaks肆虐对受虐的 self esteem自尊 . 。

Abusive Relationships and Intimidation 虐待关系和恐吓

In an abusive relationship there are often subtle forms of intimidation by the use of body language (facial expressions, gestures, etc).在一个受虐待的关系有微妙的，往往形式的恫吓所使用的肢体语言（面部表情，手势等）。 An escalation in this area would also include yelling, ranting and smashing items precious to the victim.一升级，在这方面也将包括叫嚷，演说，并砸碎了宝贵的项目向受害者。 This a bad scene all around.这是一个坏的现场，所有靠近。

Abusive Relationships and Threats 虐待关系和威胁

If the perpetrator in an abusive relationship is not getting his way, he may resort to making threats of physical violence against the other person, their children or even themselves: “If you leave me I will kill you and myself.”如果犯罪行为人在一个受虐待的关系是没有得到他的方式，他可能会诉诸决策的威胁，身体暴力侵害的其他人，他们的子女，甚至自己： “如果你离开我，我要杀了你和我” 。

Abusive Relationships and Physical Violence 虐待关系和人身暴力

In this most dangerous stage of an abusive relationship, physical violence could very well include beatings and/or sexual abuse.在这最危险的阶段，一个受虐待的关系，身体暴力，很可能包括殴打和/或性虐待。 The abuser will often apologize afterwards through tears and promises, and the victim will usually forgive them or be afraid to report the incidents, even to the local church leaders.施虐者往往会道歉后，通过眼泪和承诺，受害人通常会原谅他们，或害怕报案的事件，甚至向当地教会领袖。

Proactive Steps to Take in an Abusive Relationship积极主动的步骤，采取在一受虐待的关系

Never give up outside relationships with family, your local church pastor and trusted friends who can give godly advice in time of need.永不放弃以外的关系，与家庭，您的地方教会的牧师和值得信赖的朋友谁能给正直人的意见，在时间的需要。 In this regard, the benefits of being involved in a在这方面，带来的好处被卷入在一 Christian singles small group基督教单打小群 cannot be overstated.怎么强调也不过分。 Remember, since the victims in abusive relationships tend to be co-dependent, keeping contacts with the outside world will help them maintain realistic thinking.请记住，因为受害者在虐待关系往往是互相倚赖的，保持与外界接触世界将帮助他们保持的现实思考。
Educate yourself on the resources available for victims in abusive relationships.教育对自己现有的资源，为受害者在虐待关系。 A good place to start in the US is the National Domestic Violence Hotline.好地方开始在美国是全国家庭暴力热线。 They can be accessed via the web at ndvh.org.他们可以通过网络在ndvh.org 。 In the UK, you may want to check out hiddenhurt.co.uk.在英国，您可能会想要看看hiddenhurt.co.uk 。 In Australia, a great abusive relationship resource can be found at dvirc.org.au/HelpHub/HelpIndex.htm在澳大利亚，一位伟大的受虐待的关系资源，可以发现在dvirc.org.au / helphub / helpindex.htm
Seek professional Christian counseling to help guide you through the issues that caused you to get into an abusive relationship.寻求专业人士的基督教辅导来帮助指导您通过的问题造成你进入一个受虐待的关系。 This is important because unless you learn why you got into such a relationship, you will likely repeat the process.这很重要，因为除非你了解为什么你有这样的关系，您可能会重复这一过程。