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Pathological Liars: Are You Dating a Liar?

Pathological liars: Are you Dating a liarPathological liars are so good at lying that I pity the poor soul who is dating one, whether through an online Christian service like eHarmony, or some other way. What makes a pathological liar so different from every other big fat liar in a dating relationship?

Psychologists feel the answer is found in a paradox: Pathological liars may actually believe the twisted stories they tell their dates, but at the same time know that what they are doing is lying. What? Don’t worry about it, I don’t get it either.

All I do know is that to avoid heartbreak or worse, Christian singles should do their best to avoid such manipulative, compulsive liars. And some of these people are not just liars, they are crooks and liars. That’s what makes them so dangerous.

Singles who familiarize themselves with the schtick of a pathological liar have the best shot at evading becoming one of his or her “suckers.” Of course, since pathological lying is so believable, even if a person knows the tell-tale signs of a liar, they may still fall prey to this kind of jerk. Nevertheless, here is our “liar, liar, pants on fire” checklist of 7 liar signs to look for in your dating partner.

Pathological Liar Symptoms

  • Liars fidget a whole lot while they talk with somebody. Shifting foot positions, touching their face and mouth area, swaying, rapidly moving hands, and the like, are signs that the person feels uncomfortable while speaking with you, and could very likely be lying.

  • Liars find it almost impossible to stare you in the eyes while speaking with you. Rapid eye movements, and shifting them downward and to the right while the are talking are a strong keys they are not being truthful.

  • Liars tend to hesitate or stutter before answering a question. Often a bad liar will ask you to repeat your question in order to give them more time to make up a lie.

  • Pathological liars are extremely defensive when you question them. If they get overly defensive, asking a question in response to your question, proceed with caution.

  • Liars, especially if they are married or cheating on you, will mysteriously be unavailable for phone calls or e-mail responses. The will also exhibit other inexplicable behavior that makes you wonder if they are telling the truth. Believe your instincts if you feel this way.

  • Liars, no matter how pathological, will eventually get caught up in their own inconsistencies on things like employment, past relationships, talents, financial staus, etc.

  • All types of liars have a hard time giving a simple and short, direct answer. Most pathological liars love to spin stories mixed with truth and untruth in order to build credibility.

Ultimately, whether a single person meets a date through one of the top Christian dating services like eHarmony, ChristianMingle or Christian Cafe, or through a traditional dating path, it’s their responsibility to keep themselves from getting hurt or being deceived by a pathological liar.

Let’s keep our hearts open to romance and love, but let us also use godly wisdom. That’s why the Bible states in Proverbs 4:23: “Above all else, guard your heart, for out of it flows all the issues of life.”

Are you single with some dating experiences to share about pathological liars?

Related Posts:

Safety Dating Tips for Christian Singles
Dating Tip Advice: How to Spot a Dating Married Man
Good Christian Dating Relationship Signs
Dating Advice: When to Dump a Dating Relationship
Christian Singles Dating Unbelievers

Christian Dating Service

120 Comments

  1. For all those ever involved with a pathological liar, I know and I understand.
    I was married to a pathological liar and did not know it for 10 years. He had the worst temper and used it to deflect what he was really doing. I was just a cover, a front because he is so into the depths of hell and depravity that I was totally shocked and disgusted. When you hear of women married to serial killers, you wonder, how come they didn’t know. Of course, now I can understand so completely. Pathological liars will stop at nothing to get their way. It is totally all about them and they do it by manipulating others into feeling sorry for them and by any other means they can. They will throw out so many stories, until one sticks and catches their prey. Predator is a more exact description of these dregs of society.

    When we were getting divorced , he even lied about where I worked. It was insane as of course that is so easily provable. The point is , pathological liars are only out for themselves, they are narcissists. They have lied and conned people for so long, they feel they can say anything and people will believe them because they have been getting away with their lies for years. Do be careful because pathological liars have no moral compass. They love getting over on people, especially people who do have moral values and are trustworthy. And remember, Our Father, will take care of pathological liars and will restore the years the locusts have eaten.

    Revenge is mine. I shall repayeth, saith the Lord.
    Let God be God and handle them. He knows exactly what is a fitting and perfect justice.

    Thank God our eyes were open.
    The truth is painful at times but it sets us free not to live in captivity anymore.

    There are good men out there as not all are pathological liars!
    Trust in God.

  2. Hello! Reaging pathological liars, I’m training to be a psychologist. Must people lies from time to time. Alot of time people know the truth, and because lying have become such a habit people find themselves lying regular and alot of time the lying becomes out of control. Then what?It destroys you,eventually as a person, and alot of times it Hurts the people thats close to you(Your Heart). For all the people who really looked deeply in themselves and realize that Lying is a big issue in your life and you want to get help. That is a great step, the number one thing is you must admit and come to realization that hey I am hurting myself more and I am destroying myself and others. There is help and you can change that part about yourself if you really want to, its hard work but you can do it.

  3. In regard to Pathological Liars, I feel so stuck, I have been dating this guy for almost 3 years and we have 2 kids together, he has been lying to me ever since we got together andI never know what to believe from him. He recently lied to me and I am so fedup, but I love him so much. I feel stuck and I dont know what to do. I know he is a good person, he has had a lying problem since a child and he openly admits it, please help.

  4. Well i dated a pathological liar for 8 years…only caught him now… and he is Christian…my heart is constantly breaking… it was a break up I was not prepared for but had to do for my own sanity. Kindly lift me up in prayer, as there are days that i am just without hope.

  5. Sorry it ain’t that easy!I became married 23yrs ago to a pathologicla liar.I just discover his true colors after 23years!!!!!!He can llok me STRAIGHT in the face and not flinch.His parents were worship leaders.they also lerd a Bible study and I meant him through there…

    Here is my wisdon so HEED IT ladies!!! The Holy Spirit was tellling me “NO!!!” ButI just thought it was gear and I didn’t want to be like my non commital brother…
    Now my little boy is starting tyo lie[age 10]….

    the good news is I htink my husband can change.I have had Crhitian proffesionals tell me he can..but he has to get honest.Please pray for him.I cannot reveal his name in here of course.

    He is doing pyscological abuse to me which I consider worswe than a fist on my face because it makes you doubt your sanity.

    thank you for your prayers if anyone is listening..

  6. i was engaged to pathological liar. i dated this girl for almost 2yrs and engaged for last 6 months. she made me feel like so special. but time to time i know something wasn’t right. she was lying about a lil things. and always worrying about me, when i was at work. keep calling me everyday 5 or 6 times day. after we moved in together she called me, if i was 5 min. late coming home. she is all mad and said “what are you doing why you are not home yet”. soon as i got home she is just fine and said “i’m sorry that i got mad at you. i just missed you so much”. i knew something wasn’t right, but she made me think that she really love me. i send her to school and even paid her daughter’s daycare so that she could go to school. i did everything for her. so that we could have good life together after she finsh school. about 2 weeks before she was done with her school. she moved out on me. when i was at work. and about two weeks after she moved out, she called my friend and said she just got married. i don’t understand why she have to call my friend. she got married to a guy that going to iraq with in month or so. and her ex husband called me up few days after that and said she told him that i was abusing her and her daughter and she just moved out so he doesn’t have to worry no more, because she is with someone that wonderful to her and her daughter. he said he know she is lying and she told everybody about he was abuive husband, too. so i don’t have to worry about it. he told me thanks for raising his daughter, she was doing good when i was in her life. and he also said she is been married twice before she met me. witch i didn’t know about. 2nd guy was in army, too and she married him right before he went iraq and when he got back she was gone. i don’t know how some people could live life like that. now i know who she really is but its still hard to let it go. just keep thinking about good memories that i had been with her.

  7. I lost my kids because I beleived a narcissist liar. I can’t beleive I just spent 3 years being the victim of a narcissist at such a great cost.I hope my kids will forgive me. I am so sorry.

  8. In regard to pathological liars, the first meeting there was a connection, a lot of chemistry, with this man i did notice his eyes would constantly move from side to side when he spoke to me and he has shaky hands, it sorta made me back off, i thought maybe drugs/alcohol addiction. He was constantly working on my heart, constant texts, emails, phone calls, he worked on me for 3 mths until finally he got me hooked, even took me to a jewelry store wanting to buy me a ring, he wanted to leave his wife and marry me..i should have listened to the red flags in the beginning. , I am still wondering how someone could do this to me and how stupid could i have been..I almost contacted his wife, but decided it was not worth it. This man even got my family involved had lunch with my son, told my Daughter in law how much he loved me and would be in the family soon. This man is 53 yrs old and I am 58 yrs old. I still am hurting. My heart would not survive another relationship and I won’t trust anymore.

  9. I’ve read through all of these posts about pathological liars and have realized my situation is soooo much worse than I thought. My husband of 4 yrs has betrayed me too many times and it has changed the person I truly am. He talks to other women… via phone, text and instant messaging. When I confront him and I have physical proof of it, he still denies it. It’s unreal! His stories or versions are always so absurd and he starts getting mean when I confront him. He usually lies to me about things that he thinks will upset me. I know when he lies he is not trying to make me feel bad, he is just making himself feel better for his actions. I honestly think that he starts to believe his lies. I get more upset about the lying than the actual event or whatever. Do these pathological liars actually think that we believe all this? I guess the real problem is that we (people with actual morals) let them keep doing this to us. Maybe we are the ones with the problem.

    I know it is not as simple as just walking away. We love these people… give them the benefit of the doubt time and time again and actually believe them when they finally break down and they tell us they will get help.

    I’m so torn because I absolutely, truly love the man. I know he loves me. He’s never cheated… talked dirty or anything like that to these women. He just talks to them…. for attention maybe and he hides it. The hiding and lying makes it sooo suspicious. We have fought over this issue the past 3 yrs and he isn’t getting any better. My heart cannot take anymore surprises like this. Now he wants to go to counseling for his lying. But after reading all these posts it sounds like they will never change. And even if he does, I don’t know how long I will have this sick feeling in my stomach not knowing truly what is going on.

    What to do? Any advice from those who have been here? Should I give therapy a run or just walk away? There is a little one involved. If she wasn’t in the picture I know i wouldn’t have lasted this long. Be compassionate or have I been forgiving enough?

  10. Hi, I just found out after two years of being with my fiance and 1 year of being engaged he lied to me about his employment. Apparently an ex girlfried got him fired and in the beginning of our relationship I had some emotional issues and treated him unfairly until I realized how I was treating someone that didn’t do anything to me. He felt I was emotionally unsable and everytime he would tell me something I was critical and judgemental. After I got help and on the right meds I began to realize this man was a good hearted person and he wasn’t going to take my abuse anymore, so after 2 years of being together I found out he wasn’t employed at where he first told me. Some days it bother’s me and some days I remember how crazy and emoatinal I was. Help I don’t know what to do. I do love him very much and I do 100% know he feels the same. thanks, K

  11. I was dating a pathological liar up until very recently when he broke up with me and that night was out with his ex-girlfriend. Simply because I caught him in more lies and confronted him he wanted to run away, like always. Turns out he’s been seeing his ex for the past few weeks(about two weeks before he and I broke up). Then he called me and told me how sorry he was, only to be back out with her spending the night at her place again. His mom even tells me to move on and that I deserve better. But I love him. I can’t escape from that. Part of me really wants to make it work, but the other part of me is saying it’s not going to because he will not change. I hope to God he does. Because I love him. And life is nothing to me without such. If that means I have to put him before myself until he gets better, I will, I suppose. I can’t help it — I love him with all of my heart.
    ~Samantha

  12. Samantha
    I truly feel your pain and even down to cracks in your heart. Please do not waste any more tears on him. Pray for his soul and his ex girlfriends and move on. It will hurt it will tear you to pieces but fortunately Jesus is there waiting to put your broken heart back together. Ask him to help your loneliness and your feeling of insignificance because you do matter to Christ and since he never leaves or forsakes you you are never alone.
    Please dont give in to Satans trash, I did for so long and it only wronched my heart even more. I do know it is hard but Christ can overcome it for you.
    Love you soul
    Jewell

  13. I broke up with a pathological liar 1 year ago and am still struggling to let the anger go. It is something I pray about a lot. I sympathise with everyone else who has been in this situation. At the time I knew his stories didn’t add up but he was so good at arguing back and turning it on me and making me feel ot trusting him that in the end I would give up to keep the peace. EVen when I broke up with him it was months and months of phone call stalking telling me that he had brain tumours and was going to kill homself.

    In those points up the top of this page it says that you can pick a liar by the way they figit and don’t make eye contacty and stutter. I’m afraid that is not always the case. A true pathological liar becomes so involved in their lies that they don’t flinch when they lie or are covering that lie with another lie. My ex could look me straight in the eye and lie.

    Thank you to everyone for sharing on here. It has helped me to not feel so alone in this.

  14. well I can definitely agree with that. Pathological liars lie so well until you almost become aware that it’s an addiction just like a addict of substance, an addict of food and any other addiction. I think they believe their own lies so it dosen’t matter if you believe them or not because in their mind “it’s the truth”. I feel the only way for them to be helped is through the divine power of prayer (lots of prayer). I almost feel sorry for a person whos whole life consist mostly lies until they don’t even understand that they have a serious problem that most likely result in major issues if they don’t @ some point learn how to be truthful.

  15. I need to say to Samantha that you need to get away from that guy. I know you love him now and you are still emotionally attached but that will subside one you get away from hima and move on. You deserve better that that for youself and you need to love yourself enough to believe that you do deserve better than that.

    He has cheated on you and lied to you. He won’t change that unless he really wants to and it sounds to me like he doesn’t. He will keep treating you like crap because you let him.

    I felt sorry for my pathological lying ex for a couple of weeks and now I don’t at all. He has made those decisions for his life and he can deal with it and without me being in his life.

    Please be strong.

  16. I think a ton of this stuff if very wrong and really damn hurtful. You do not understand the first thing about pathological liars. There is a big difference between a pathological liar and an ass of a man or woman who lies all the time to be unfaithful or for any other harmful/deceitful reason.

    I came to terms with the fact that I was a pathological liar a few years ago, and it was a problem that I had since I was young. My memory is often patchy, and every now and then I realize that certain memories that I had (not very big or important ones mind you) didn’t actually happen. It is very scary when you realize that memories you had were actually constructs of your own mind. I only realized and accepted it as a problem when I realized that my first instinct to answer many questions asked to me was to lie. Things like shifting the time five minutes ahead or lying about what I ate for dinner a few nights ago. These kinds of things don’t matter, and it makes no sense to lie about them! I make myself stick to all promises I make, so that was my loved ones have a fail-safe to know that I am being genuine. Having adult ADHD/ADD combination doesn’t really help things along, especially when people use wrong “lie detection techniques” as stated in your “Pathological Liar Symptoms.” You have a few points of truth in that list, but i guarantee you that if you are dealing with a pathological liar, most of that list won’t apply to them. If you reject someone that the above list “applies” to, then you have either just alienated an ass that isn’t worth dating, or more likely by your list, a quality person with attention or nervousness issues with whom you could have had a connection.

    It is not an easy thing to tell anyone, let alone someone you are dating and/or love, that you are a pathological liar or once had a problem with it. Often when you put your trust in people to open up about this kind of problem, from that point on they walk on eggshells all the time wondering whether or not they are being truthful or faithful. If that person was truly that deceitful and wrong, he/she wouldn’t have mentioned that they had the problem in the first place! They would have kept it to themselves to continue getting away with lying. Even if they don’t open up about it, that doesn’t mean they are deceitful, mean, or evil. It is hard to realize when it is a real psychological problem, and even harder to tell anyone for fear of never being trusted with ANYTHING ever again. I didn’t want to lie to my girlfriend about anything, and I have to continue to fight not to do so. When I first told her I had a problem with pathological lying, I was hesitant and scared to death that she was going to leave me and never talk to me again. If that would have happened, I would have lost one of my closest friends, my partner, and the love of my life. She didn’t judge me, and she agreed that she believed if I was trying to deceive her, I wouldn’t have told her I had a problem. I believe that has made us closer.

    I am not condoning lying or cheating by any means. Honestly, I think that being unfaithful in a relationship is one of the worst things possible, because the act of cheating directly hurts the one person who gave their heart away only to have it crushed by the one they loved. I am just pointing out that pathological lying is commonly used to describe a person who lies frequently and isn’t trustworthy because they are deceitful. This is not the case. If you want to reword this article “Demon in the Flesh: Are You Dating a Liar?” or simply just “Are You Dating a Liar?” I would be perfectly fine and supportive. However, if you are going to put up a medical/psychological condition of which someone doesn’t have full control over and then rant about how these people are worse than actual liars and cheaters, I pray for you as you are casting judgment upon others and incorrectly at that.

  17. Dear Rider, I agree with you that some of the comments posted doesn’t necessarily sound like the people they dealt with were pathological liars. You say you were one and have worked through it with your girlfriend. Maybe your case wasn’t as severe. You probably had a compulsive lying disorder. This is different from being a being a pathological liar. I’m no shrink by any means, but I dont think a pathological liar can cure his or herself. Not on their on anyway. If you are truly cured, congratulations. Now, to Mickey, I hope you read this, as it’s been a while since you last posted. I completly understand where you’re coming from. Your comments sound so much like what I went through and still have problems with but it’s tapered down a bit. I dont know how long that is going to last. My ex was a pathological liar or should I say is a pathological liar. These liars are good at making you feel guilty when you know you are not guilty. I’ve been through what you’ve been through. They are so good at getting what they want and they could care less who they hurt in the process. They lie about any and everything. My ex would call me repeatedly too. Making up story after story trying to make me feel bad. Sometimes I feel like an idiot for falling for him, but I believe everthing happens for a reason and one day I will understand. My ex knew how to con people including me. He was emotionally and verbally abusive at times. He always claimed he loved me and would never leave me. The longer I stayed with him, the harder it was to get out. He still calls me at work telling more lies trying to get me back. I’ve have not heard from lately though. To end this, my advice to anyone involved with a pathological liar is to get out fast! I was hurt emotionally and finacially. I could write a book.

  18. Amanda Monette

    I can relate, my son’s father is a pathological liar also, and the bible states that Stan’s native tongue is lying and that pretty much sums it all up.

    God Bless all for staying strong.

  19. You are wrong about the signs pathological liars show when lying. They are not nervous or uncomfortable and they have no problem looking you in the eye. In fact, they often sound more convincing than a “normal person” who is telling the truth, since the normal person may be worried about not being believed.

    Contrary, a pathological liar is not worried about being caught lying. It’s like they can not grasp the possible consequences of getting caught.

  20. For those who are pondering leaving a liar – Yes, it’s difficult. I did it, though, and if I can do it anyone can. I’m weak, gullible, extremely naive. But, I did it. I made it through emotionally by planning ahead to fill those times with replacements. One good to break a bad habit (treating a bad relationship like a bad habit) is to replace it – like replacing cigarettes with gum. Not magic, but it sure helps.

    Figure out, when are you going to feel the most lonely? Right after work? Arrange to meet friends for supper after work, or invite friends over if you can’t afford to eat out. If you have kids, find others with kids and it will be easier to make play dates for the kids while the adults talk. But, beware, it will be difficult and painful. What I truly see now is what I thought before was difficult WAS HELL. I thought I was in a difficult relationship, that I should just try harder, stop complaining, etc. But, now that I”ve been out of it for years, I realize now that I was going through complete hell that I wouldn’t wish on my worst enemy (even him). He kept calling after I left, but as my life started to improve, was starting to be around NICE people, life was beginning to get just so much better that the longer it went on the less tempting his phone calls and emails became. I changed my phone number, rejected his emails, didn’t even read, sought CARING people (they’re so much more fun to be around!!!), and listened to the advice of older people with experience. BEWARE of advice from people who are in relationships that they have to try hard at. There are many people who say that if one works hard on a relationship it will eventually work. That only works if the other person is genuine, and people who have no guilt conscience will NEVER care, and the relationship will NEVER, unless you consider accepting cheating and lying as a working relationship. Work all you want and you will only be drained, depressed, and die very young.

    So, how do you spot a liar? The signs given above are good, yes they are sometimes for nervous people who are telling the truth. But, sometimes you can tell a lie if someone does those things and usually is a calm person. HOWEVER< a truly pathological liar is very charismatic and their lies are told with more calm and confidence than their truth. It’s weird, but serial killers and pathological liars are not like other people and you really cannot tell when they are lying by their mannerisms. Truly pathological people often pass even a lie detector test. BUT, if you notice when their stories don’t match up, that’s the only way to tell. Have you called their work, found out they weren’t there, then asked them how work was? If they lie like THAT, when you have evidence that they were NOT at work and later they say that they were, that is the only way to find out a pathological liar. EVIDENCE.

    We all want to blame the victim, see signs, because if we can blame the victim it feels like we are more in control. Like rape victims, even WOMEN will say, “she was dressed scantilly” or whatever, because they want to believe that if they dress a certain way it won’t happen to them. But the truth is, oftentimes victims were just in the wrong place at the wrong time. The sad truth is, we can’t tell a pathological liar from an honest person by their mannerisms, no matter how much we may want to. They’re good at what they do. They only way is to keep your eyes open for inconsistencies and evidence of lies.

    Like the woman in this post who checked the email, sometimes we have to check stories to find out if people are liars. However, if you check stories and you find someone that tells the truth consistently, it is time to trust.

  21. Luka Magnotta

    All I wanted was to have a mature enough boyfriend to include me in his life. Im so tired of fighting to have a normal relationship.

    I just want a boyfriend that couldve stood up for me.

    I wanted a boyfriend who WANTED to go for walks with me, play basketball with me, go to the beach with me, go to movies with me, suppers with me and spend quality time with me and FORGET about his friends and what they were doing….but enjoy ME!

    I guess that was too much to ask, all I got was him asking me to have sex with strangers in bathhouses and on craigslist and lies.
    His one retarded friend was jealous of our relationship and friendship and so he tols everyone he say me on T.V and ruined any of my chances of having a friendship with his buddies.

    My boyfriend is too blinde to see that his “best friend’ was jealous of our friendship/relationship and he was spreading rumors.

    My boyfriend always cared more about his friends feelings then mine.

    I always felt like I loved him more then he loved me and I always had to fight to make him warmer to me. I remember in the beginning he would love to lay and look into my eyes. now its a chore and an argument. That’s how I know he’s a phony.

  22. Wow! Talk about pathological liars! Everything happens for a reason, like coming across this page. Where do I begin? Well, I have known this pathological liar/guy since I was in grade school, lost touch for years and got back into contact. We were friends and somehow a romance developed. He lied about getting his education, getting into a car accident(calling me always stating he was in the hospital), having a kid, and his occupation. When I found out he was lying, I called him out on it and asked him why he’s lying about those things. He seemed as if it was nothing and excuse was, I am embarrassed and so it’s like he had to create it to make him sound so much more appealing to impress me.

    BUT there is no excuse, you shouldn’t take severe lying as an excuse. 6 months later it seems he doesn’t lie anymore, but the problem is that lack of trust. You know it in your gut when he starts lying again about stupid stuff. So ask yourself, when you marry this person someday can you honestly deal with the lying? That would be a life in hell. A couple of my friends married pathological liars, 10 years into it they can see a ‘slight’ change, but everything is still uncertain. Plans still change, lies still creep in. So as hard as it is, you need to do the right way and keep faith in God. It’s all in your gut and intuition. Love does not lie, it is patient and kind. Emotional abuse, tempers, lying…that’s the work of evilness. God put this pathological liar in our life for a reason to magnify something within ourselves, so take that lesson..have no hatred or regrets and RUN before you invest years of your life.

  23. Dear California,

    You are right in everything that you are saying. Is the person that you are speaking about a Christian? It doesn’t sound like it. We all make mistakes. Christians are no exceptions. From your comment though, it doesn’t seem like this person has any regret or repentance in his heart. The best thing you can do is pray for him and minister to him. Romance with this person is not a good idea until he comes closer to God and invites the Holy Spirit into his heart.

    God Blesss,
    Jodi

  24. Pathological liar! I thought I was the only victim. I am a person who is in relationship with a pathological lair for 9 years, I got married to this person 4 years back. Everyday he kept telling small and big lies. but I didn’t know what to do. I was in a stage that I couldn’t live without him. Whenever I confronted his lies he used to lose his temper and slowly started emotionally and physically abusing me. I was trapped. I couldn’t tell this to my family. and I still love him deeply.

  25. Thanks Jodi. He is not a Christian and doesn’t really believe in God–so what on earth am I doing? I guess I fell in love with him and because I’ve known him since grade school.

    Tina–wow. I really need advice because he says he’s going to do whatever it takes to be with me and marry me. However, he is using the same tactic. Is there any possible way we can all email each other for support?? Try to get in touch with me ladies, I think we could use talking to each other for support.

  26. hi california,
    I can very well understand your situation.you know he has lied to you and still lying to you.you are stuck between your love for him and his character.

    If your instinct say don’t marry this guy,follow that.always follow your instinct,because evenafter you get married to him hoping he would change,your instincts will come up whenever he lies to you and that will spoil the relation.both of your life wil get ruined.

    Have you heard the story about a frog and a scorpion.its the best example for our situation.no one changes their behaviour,one day or the other it will show up.

    From my experience I’m telling u,Just run away from him,never mind what he says,it your life your future.you will definitely get a god fearing man.I never listened to my instinct and now I’m suffering,i surrender everything to god.

    Think well and act wise.
    I wish you get the best.
    God bless

    Tina

  27. Okay well, im 16 years old and my boyfriend is 17. I do believe he is a pathological liar. He says so many crazy and insane stories, I just want to smack him in the face! My friend even agrees. And he’s the one who showed me this site, and said my boyfriend could be like this. I looked at the symptoms and I started to cry because Jason fit almost all of them. One of his stories is he fought a tree, and lost. Also that he has a squirrel friend running around the neighbordhood wit a knife and pirate eye patch. He also lies about how many friends he had on myspace, that was an easy lie to figure out. He even makes up the weirdest comments to people… i can’t think of any right now though, sorry. And when i try to say something to him, it’s like he’s trying to get me to be quiet and let him do the talking still. HE’S BASICALLY THE ONLY ONE WHO TALKS IN THE RELATIONSHIP!! We have been dating for almost 6 months now. I try to get a word in and when I do, he sucks in his breath and says, No.. and blah blah blah. I don’t know what to do with him. I want to bring this up to him, but I don’t know how. I know that if I dont tell him this, this will lead to our downfall, and I don’t want to break up with him. We say we love each other with all our hearts, and that we won’t leave each other.. but honestly, I don’t think we know what love is.
    And in his other relatioship, he did the same thing and he even got engaged to her and he said he will always be with her. Well, it was a bitter end to that relationship.
    Please??!! help me someone. tell me what to do…im desperate

  28. Oh, dear, I fit pretty much all the outward symptoms of a pathological liar except the inconsistencies part, and even that I might fit if I told a person only a small part of a story for brevity’s sake and the a different part of the same story another time when it became relevant–yet I really try very hard to be honest in all my dealings with others! I’m a very timid, perfectionistic person–with mild audio dyslexia on top of it that makes it challenging to HEAR what people asked/said to me and almost impossible to “go with the flow” of conversation–and I really hope I do not end up simply looking dishonest when I am trying my hardest to communicate with others. I guess it doesn’t matter in a dating context at this point because I’m not in a relationship and I doubt any of the local men want to date me or they would have asked already.

    I know a little bit about pathological–or is it compulsive?–liars due to my sister’s tendency to date them. They tell her exactly what she wants to hear, even when she has already caught them lying about both extremely unnecessary little things (like how late they stayed up playing a video game) and huge messes (like cheating with a man, drug dealing…). So many lies unraveled, so many tears of betrayal shed… Even if the person she finds out she’s dating is completely different from the mask she fell in love with, she’s so eager to forgive and go back for more. I don’t understand!
    I wish I understood. Then maybe I could say something helpful to Alexis and the others above. I don’t understand what kind of love holds together people whose relationship does not even allow them to express themselves to one another mutually. Maybe I’m too inexperienced with other people to understand things like this? I hope your lives all play out well regardless.

  29. From my very recent and painful experience, I have learnt that liars are totally smooth operators. Under the guise of honesty,
    they can tell you ‘truths’ and because it seems so wonderful that they are voluntarily being so ‘honest’ about their murky past. I was too trusting, because I was impressed by the ‘honesty’ and thought ‘this guy may have done terrible things in his past, but at least I know about them and how repentant he is for them’. I was sucked in and I learnt the very hard way. There were far worse truths that he hid from me, and ultimately this has led to my heart being broken repeatedly and my life being endangered.

    One lesson I have learnt is: Do not trust a man who does not trust you. He is untrustworthy – a liar. If he spends his time asking suspicious questions (often with an air of interest in you, but he is really trying to discover any nasty things in your past), I have found it is because he has many suspicious things to hide himself. He is deflecting the blame. It is very hard for a liar to believe another person is telling the truth, as he can’t help but tell frequent lies himself. He thinks you are like him. It is extremely exhausting to deal with. Ultimately you get extremely hurt, because the ‘truths’ you get told are the convenient ones which won’t jeopardise the relationship, and the real truth is so much worse, and in my case, dangerous.

    If a person seems too good to be true, sadly that is likely to be the case. A persons’ good intentions do not mean that they actually are a good person. Words are cheap but actions are telling. It is very hard to gauge the latter if you have a long-distance or web-based relationship. A bad egg may want to become a good one, but it’s very difficult to change after years of pathological lying – even for those who have come to know God. Good things take time – do you want to suffer in the meantime for all of his bad choices? Do you want to be repeatedly hurt? It’s not a place I ever wish to go back to. Our lives are worth more than that. Don’t sacrifice yourself at the altar of someone else’s evolution – I don’t believe that is God’s plan for us.

  30. i had an exboyfriend for 5 years and this guy lied more than anyone i ever knew.this one ruined me financially, physically(pacemaker now) emmotionally. my doctor saw the signs and told me to get out fast. This man played the role to get a large sum of money out of me and then told me when i asked for it back he told me that i was a fool to even lend it to him. The love i thiught we had was a lie also, and other things i could go on & on. we have a child together so i still have to listen to his lies. and i have proof for all his lies and now he is going to be put to a stop. stealing from me like he did is stealing from my children too. you don’t do that. i wish i could go back and change things so this would have never happened. HE WILL GET CAUGHT TRUST ME. God Bless and a Happy New Blue moon year.

  31. I wish I’d found this site sooner, though I was in love and probably wouldn’t have believed the man I loved would keep lying constantly.

    I married him, married for 7 years, together for 11 years and 3 children. I knew he lied a lot. He was very promiscuous before meeting me. He was sexually agressive with me, always trying to get me to do more sexual things while dating and even while married (he’s the only man I’ve ever been with).

    He just dropped a bomb 5 weeks ago that he had sex with 8 people last year! Some were men, some were women, all unprotected!! Praise God the STD tests have been negative!

    He is a sex addict, has done something sexual with our dog (whom we no longer have) and did something sexual with ou daughter when she was almost 2 years old. He is highly intelligent and hid EVERYTHING! My parents are shocked and he may end up in prison over what happened with our daughter. She is 6 now and has no knowledge of the incident thank goodness!

    He lied up until last week about what happened exactly with our daughter. The detective brought the whole truth out when I listened to his confession.

    He is a lost lost man and he is really seeking God. I asked him to read The Shack last fall and this is what started making him feel guilty about all he’d done, up to that point he lied to himself that he had not really done all of these terrible things. The Shack made it all real.

    I understand about forgiveness, and I do feel sorry for him. I am angry however and we are getting divorced as I CAN NOT be with a man who sexually abused my daughter, as he may again some day. We are not living together anymore, but I still talk with him as he was the love of my life even though he didn’t always treat me well emotionally. He’s always had flat emotions, like never really that happen nor sad.

    Please for the poster passing judegment on some of us choosing divorce…remember all of us are in different situations than you. Some of us (like me), have NO choice to go back to our spouses. Legally, my husband may never have unsupervised visitation with our children again. I do not plan to ever leave him alone with him.

    I am now delving into single parenthood, and since he may be a registered sex offender, he may never even get another job (and he had a 5 year college degree), so I will never get any type of financial support. I’m 31 years old and met him when I was 19 years old.

    In spite of all of this, the pain is at times unbearable. I get angry, sad, frustrated, I’m very very hurt. I still love him, but I will be going to counseling as I need to know how to get away emotionally from this man whom I loved so unconditionally.

    So please, be aware that while your spouse may pass moral borders, they may also pass legal ones. My spouse also paid someone for sex, had sex in public places with other people while we were married, etc….he never was caught and I am glad because I would not want to have found out about all of this from the police.

    Lying points to huge spiritual issues….I know for me if I ever date again (which just seems so strange to me as I truly promised myself only to my husband when we wed), if a man lies to me, I will NOT be with him.

    Also, pornography is incredibly evil! The incident with my daughter happened when he was looking at adult porn. If you catch a spouse looking at it, they need help, immediately! My spouse is a software engineer and he was able to hid anything he looked at on the computer from me and I never suspected it anyhow.

    I actually saw spiritual warfare in play just 3 days after he told me everything that happened. Our pastor came to our house and he witnessed it as well. It was scary, and I’ve read that porn can bring demons. My husband is seeing counselors, and a pastor exerienced in spiritual warfare and attending sex addiction meetings. He’s trying, yet, because of all he’s done (especially with our daughter), I can never go back…let alone with a relapse with sleeping with people, I cannot risk contracting HIV!

    I now will be a single mother who has recently recovered from a chronic illness (well, I am in remission, relapse is possible), no job, and if he goes to prison, I will be forced to file for Bankruptcy as I was a stay at home mother for our children. It’s been 3.5 years since I’ve worked, I am an RN and I’ve submitted resumes, but have not found a job to date. My life is in shambles, yet God has been good…my brother and his wife opened their home to me and my children, I have no STD’s, the kids have a great new school, ect. God has held me and I’ve felt his power and his love.

    I feel for all of you caught up in this twisted lying web of your loved ones….please let this be a wake up call for what can and MAY happen!

  32. in love with a liar

    I recently got rid of the man who lied to me, and everyone around him, over and over and over again. I realize now its his illness and I pray for him daily.
    The biggest lie was a lie of ommission….he waited 14 months into our relationship to inform me that he’s HIV positive. I’m the mother of 4 kids, under the age of 13.
    I’m negative so far, but have to test again in 3 months.
    Keep me in your prayers.

  33. Can anybody help me deal with this by giving me any bible verses that speak of pathological liars me and my girlfriend have been datin for a year and I come to find out recently when she was going out with her friends she was actually going to parties on guys houses I don’t know if she has cheated. And we are planning on getting back together we are both just depressed and need guidance through this. We were perfect, she just made some bad choices. 🙁 does anybody have any bible verses for her to change her ways and me to forgive her?

  34. Like most. I wasn’t prepared for the damage I have face living with a liar for five years (breat cancer, ulcer) The relationship started of great “so I thought”. He and his actions appeared sincere and honest. He wasn’t a drinker, a smoker and loved kissing and cuddling watching movies. Then the lies started unvailing (his mail, his phone, his ex. etc), and when he could know longer hide the real him…booy did the DEVIL show himself. This man lied about being divorced. When we first meet he told me that he had been divorsed for 3 yrs. He was still married for the first 1 1/2 of our relatiohship and had just departed from his exwife a few months prior to meeting me. I saw know sign of this…..he was living alone when I meet him. Later, I found out he lied about his children, his work ( a plumber), his finances…the list goes on and on. I realized this person does not love me. I’m just another prey for his selfishness. These kind are all about themselves. They will lie to anyone, even their on parents, childredn, anyone for the benefit of self. The liar will never change. Never! One day at a time……GET OUT!! Save yourself. You deserve better.

  35. I won’t say much – given the experience I had was with someone who googles the living daylights out of my email addresses. Anyway all the signs you reference in the article above are spot on -whatever may be the label may be for this “type” of dishonest person. In my experience though the closer you get to the person the less they display the physical signs – but many of the behaviors continue – constant questioning of your honesty while blowing up anytime you dare to question them on the silliest little thing. I think they may get into a comfort zone or something once they have lied to a person over time which makes many of the above behaviors more frequent and intense. That said – listen to those around you who meet them as well. In my case nearly all of my friends and family, co-workers who met this person had a very consistent poor first impression given they did not ever look them in the eye and something seemed “peculiar – definately hiding something”. On several occasions they also observed aggressive defensiveness and possessiveness. That should have been warning enough for me – but like many people I tend to keep looking for the good in people before casting them off and this person was charming and outgoing and fun to be with. Unfortunately I gave the benefit of the doubt for far to long to a person who was living at minimum a double life -cheating on their spouse (not divorced as they pretended to be, or getting one as the story changed to once found out) and me with each other and multiple others while lying to everyone in their life about many many things. Over time some of the truth came out but it was too late and life altering damage was done which affected many people and will for the rest of our lives. After having your complete life irreversably altered – by someone else’s deception – it is very hard to not be angry. That said, I try to remember that they are a child of God just like the rest of us – I think prayers are in order on both sides – the hurt someone must have felt to become that way – and for the collateral damage done to others as a result. Good luck to all on the post. I hope you are able to find peace and happiness and trustworthy people to spend the rest of your life with.

  36. I am a Roman Catholic with high morals and standards. Because of my trusting nature, as one would naturally expect of another supposedly good person, I became a victim in a relationship where my ex-partner turned out, as I had discovered, to be a pathological liar. The breakup has caused me a lot of hur and pain, and it has taken me almost 2 months to figure out what happened, why it happened, and the logic behind it. If you look up wikipedia, you will find a true decription of the behavioural patterns of a pathological liar. From my experience, my gosh, I think he has a mental problem, but having said this, he never truely cared for me, or for my welfare. We broke up because he realised I was onto his B–Sh-t talk. I’ve spent weeks crying, and trying to piece everything that has happened together, and I have finally done it. He deserves no mercy from God, nor from me. He caused my family a lot of distress too, you see we planned to get married etc. Naturally my parents and siblings were devastated when the relationship ended in a split second. It was never my fault, I know I was good to him, I treated him unlike any other boyfriend previously, I was too perfect. I just hope I can move on, erase him from my memory, and hope to meet my true soulmate, someone who’ll treat me like I treated him (for he was truely undeserving). Anyone who mentions on here that these pathological liars need our prayers, to be honest, I prayed and prayed for him, he used to tell me lies about being ill etc, and he really took advantage of my caring and loving nature, they don’t need prayers, they need to be buried in a cemetary where they can cause no other person harm. Sorry, but you know, if you treat me bad, I hope you get treated 100x bad of what you treated me.

  37. I am a Christian and I must say that I am extremely hurt by this site. Pathological Lying is a medical disorder in the front of the brian. What this means is that Pathological Liars have more “white” areas in the front of their brian, causing them to lie more. Autism has very little “white” in the front of the brian, causing them to not be able to lie, or lie very little. These people cannot help that they are lying. They are not trying to hurt anyone, it is mostly done because, one, they cannot help it, and two, they have low self esteem. As Christians, we should try to reach out and help those in need and guide them. Where’s the forgiveness? This is not how Jesus would treat or talk about anyone. Instead of ridiculing people, why not try to help?

  38. Literally 2 days ago I just finally ended things- he continues to send me messages and beg for forgiveness and admits to his problem and says he would do anything.
    He’s handsome, funny, smart, we had the best times ever. he was undoubtedly the first man i ever fell in love with.. he sent me poems and made me feel like a princess and on top of the world. he had his controlling moments and had issues because he said he was a navy seal and had gone to Iraq. we were only together 7 months-long distance. then things got rough and one weekend i was busy and his ex fiance (4 years) called me and just told me everything. this man was so manipulative, he put you under a spell. it was disgusting. he was never a navy seal, he never went to iraq (he had 3 tattoos for his friends that died there) um he got kicked out of the navy in a few months for a DUI and all his money went to probation when he told me he came home for his mom who has MS. it was just a string of lies…then i found out he cheated and he even had people that were there call me and deny it…but i know he did. he cheated on his ex constantly. im still coping but i’ve become good friends with his ex (we went to high school together) and shes making sure i dont fall back because he has a way of brainwashing you. its so hard–i still miss him and i still want to be with him, it’s crazy how he is such a sweet talker. but i know i gotta get away from all of it. he lies about every detail of his life and when i found out about a few he admitted that it made him feel better about himself. now i wonder if i can help him–but subconsciously i know that that’s most likely not going to happen.

  39. i just got out of a 2month long relationship with a pathological liar. in those 2 months i believed he was a throat cancer survivor, self employed doing graphic design, his ex was a coked out prostitute, his grandma was sick and dying in the hospital, was not doing drugs and quitting drinking, his family disowned him because they want to talk to his ex, he lost his license because of his ex.. oh they go on. one week before we broke up he was staying with me at my house and i began to notice he was trying to isolate me and control me, and he even TRIED to impregnate me! he slapped me “playfully” but too hard. (dont worry, i got some good shots in after that) he would withhold affection as punishment for my “disobeying” him. he finally told me there was something “sexy about death!” i waited until he was safely back in his home 40 some minutes away and ended it. he continues to threaten me and harass me online, of which i have put in a police report, deleted and blocked him. ladies and gentleman, i began to wake up when one of the christian magazines i subscribe to came in the mail and read “what or who is preventing you from focusing on god?” and i remembered in the 2 months we have been together, i hadnt been to church! he mocked me when i studied my bible at home. do not take your focus off the lord. when man fails, the lord does not! he never disappoints, and he always has your best interest. if you cannot pursue the lord in your relationship, if you cannot grow in all areas of intelligence, spirituality, physical health, mental health even finances… it is time to reevaluate whether you are in a healthy relationship that promotes the welfare of both parties involved!

  40. I wish we could all be sensitive to these pathological liars, but teaching them to be empathetic only teaches them more manipulation skills. I am a psychology grad and we learned that for psychopathic traits, treatment only makes them worse. They are almost a lost cause. I dated a pathological liar and it was very painful and confusing. The love you feel for them is lies, based on the image they created specifically for you. These people don’t have consistent personalities or self images. They really just adapt to what will get them what they want, as sad as it is. DO NOT TRUST THEM and offering them help only makes you more of a target.

  41. JESSICA: If you justify these people by a medical disorder, are you suggesting we have no free will at all??

    There is still lots of information lacking in autism research and psychopaths. No one knows why someone is autistic, and all autistic people vary. They do not all have the same symptoms in the brain otherwise it would be a more predominant theory. As of now they don’t really know much. Same with psychopaths.

    my point is I am an extremly sympathetic person, I am training to be a therapist. Which is why I’m saying from an educated point of view…. YOU CANNOT HELP A PSYCHOPATH. HELP MAKES THEM WORSE. it is proven.

  42. Yes…I married one and tried to stay married for 20 years. He moved me away from Family, then he told me that No one liked me, and as and after the children grew up…he told them, “No one likes your mother.” He lied to us and was off traveling and involved with prostitutes, and told me “I’m just helping those poor women that need money.” Then he told me I was not considerate of these women neededing money, so that meant he would have to take my children away from me. It meant I was not being a good mother.” He was gone alot, and earned enough money to support us. I was torn between leaving him, or staying so that the children could have what they need. I did not know what to do or where to turn. On divorcing him, his abuse got much worse….he threatened to ruin my life, and told my son that he could do whatever he wanted to do….including be abusive to me and his sister, like his Dad did. This is a sick story of trying to stay with this type of a person….he’s not a man. There is no human being as a man inside this type of person. He says things such as “You are lucky to have me…you are nothing, and look what I am.” And that I was jealous of him, or others were jealous of him, and that he had this talent where he could “Always get what he wanted in life.”….he would do harmful things to me, and put our lives in harm, and then laugh about how badly it upset me.

    I realize I needed the strength to go to the police long ago, but was so afraid of him, because he would not behave this way in from of others. Others would see him going to church, regularly….and that he provided well for us, and would only doubt what I said. In the end you feel like your identify has been ruined, and your rights as a person, a wife a mother, have all been abused by this man, including my rights with my family or origin. All of it was abuse.

    I live in sadness still, that my son now thinks and behaves like this man. My daughter will not have a relationship with her brother due to his behavior. This son is obviously lonely and has no one but his abusive father, whom he adores. My ex remarried, and is off living his abusive life with someone else. I assme she must know something, but he always finds ways with money to get beyond it when people notice his lies….he simply buys them more things. This can be flattering to a woman, and he knows it, so does it. They are almost impossible to escape from.

    Be ware….these people will ruin EVERYTHING IN YOUR LIFE, AND YOUR CHILDREN’S LIVES AS WELL, and you will find it near impossible not to live as “their victim.”

  43. 3.5 years ago I met a man who had been down on his luck in life but claimed he wanted to change & make his life better. I believed him and was happy to help. He was engaging and easy to talk to. We talked for hours everyday. We spent a lot of time together. Well after 3 months of dating I started to find out a couple of hurtful lies. Instead of leaving him I stated with him like a dumb-dumb because I believed that he needed time to break his bad patterns. After all I had seen a lot of growth in him during that short time period.

    Anyway, 3 years later, 4 therapists later, I realized that although he was the first love of my life I can’t keep sacrificing myself for him. He has lied so much. He has cheated (don’t have proof if he slept with anyone) but, phone numbers, emails, pictures, texts, voicemail messages to other women, men and transvestites. It has all been a very shocking and hurtful experience, but, it has been a valuable learning experience for me. This man comes across as being charming and personable. He got SAVED while we were together. We read the bible together every night and go to church most Sundays. I believe that he wants to do well I just think that his demons are more powerful than his will.

    He has drained me. He has 2 children from different women and has put me in confrontations against them. After 3 months of dating him I was contacted by a woman who claimed she had just given birth to his son (this is the 2nd child). She ended up being his former girlfriend that he never told me about and NEVER told me that some woman was pregnant with his child. Eventually I had to file harassment charges against her because she would hunt me down, i.e., find out my phone numbers and call my house and cell constantly, find out where I wanted to move to and eventually where I moved to, threaten to come to my job, found out my email address, came to some cookouts and bbq’s that I was invited to. She always made a scene accosting him and I on the public street. It was crazy! I can’t blame her completely because she had also been one of his victims but was taking her anger and aggression out on me instead of him. She still loved him and just had his baby.

    I had to hide so much of what he did from my family. I’ve been anrgy, hurt and enraged. Many times it has taken me from the path that God has set for me, but thanks to the Holy Spirit I was always redirected back to my path. He has a violent nature which brought out a violent nature in me because of all the anger and pain.

    Please, please, please do research and take time in dating your future Mr. or Mrs. Right. The devil is so busy. Many people are dishonest and/or sick. They hide their true nature and manipulate the relationship for their advantage. They suck you in like vaccuum.

    I’m not nieve. I met this man when I was 33yrs old. I’m now 37yrs old. So I’ve dated plenty of men before him and have shared in my portion of heartaches and heartbreaks. I fell in love with this man. He became the the first love of my life and I lost myself. In the bible it says ‘Guard your heart”. Rememeber to do that. Many times in this relationship I did not recognize this woman that was me. I don’t want anyone else to go through this. Pray and be careful in this world. We are fighting evil, demonic spirits everyday. Remember the expression ‘a wolf in sheep’s clothing’.

  44. well, I was reading some of the letters, I’m a “victim” as well.. I meet him on a site, eharmony ( the site has no fault whatsoever) he had this profile of “perfection” and he contacted me, he is from Brazil, ( later on, he told me that I contacted him) ha!.. I never did that.. I’m an old fashioned girl, I let that the men take the lead.
    we started talking via skype, and he looked like a good person, but he wasn’t… all that he said was lies, and more lies. ( I realized that later)
    he told me that he worked, that he was responsible etc.. he is 29 years old and live with his parents!.. he plays word of warcraft like 4-5 hours a day!!.. he plays drums.. and doesn’t earn a dime..
    he came to my city, and I paid for every meal, every movie, everything.. because I was too brainwashed… why?.. because I thought that it was “fair”. just because he bother to come here.
    17 hours plain trip.. ( and every day he was here he was like – hey.. I deserve this.. just because.. etc it was a vacation to him, no more)
    I treated him so good,, like a king or something like that..
    he lost the best thing that could ever happened to him.. I broke up with him like 5 times.. and he never let me.. I was too good!
    I’m mad with myself for wasting my time with him.
    now he is “out” there, claiming more victims.. he isn’t capable of love.. he just loves himself. not even his family he didn’t care, never talked to them.. etc..
    it’s my fault as well I should have said see you later, when he was here.. but my “kindness” stopped me.
    he only wants sex, he was insisting so much, that’s the reason why I didn’t do it mostly, even if I didn’t do it, I feel bad because he is so disgusting, now that I see things in a different way..
    he feels superior, even when in reality it’s very inferior.
    I feel sorry for him and for the next one,
    he only wants sex.. and I’m glad that I didn’t do it with him.. I have peace of mind, I really learned a lot.. never thought that this could happen to me… be with somebody so unworthy of living so cruel to people..
    I could put his name here, and everything, but it would make me like him..

  45. I am in the same “boat”. I have been with the same guy for 3 years and I recently found out about others. He lies to me all the time to my face. I am leaving the relationship, but have one question. I know one of the women with whom he was with while also with me. I am not angry with her because I realize this is his BIG problem, but I would like to email or call this woman (a very sweet, gentle and kind lady) just to let her know that she is not alone (she had a nervous breakdown). I also want to know what types of lies he told her. (She knows of me and I know of her, but we have never met). I have written a very nice email to her, because I just want to know what types of things he told her. I want to know the truth. We are both Christian women.
    I have a feeling she would love to talk to me. Please don’t say, “let it go”. Others have told me to contact her, just to get this off my mind and get resolution. I actually have a feeling she would like to talk to me too. Opinions…. please,

  46. Don’t even know where to begin. Got swept off my feet by a sweet, loving man (or at least thats what I was lead to believe). Had been so cautious and would look for red flags when I first met someone because did not want to get hurt again. My boyfriend treated me better than anyone has ever treated me but then he asked me to move in with him and I said yes. Wow, what an eye opener it was. I have caught him in so many lies regarding: money, other women, stupid things that really are little things. When I ask him questions about what he told me, he becomes angry and makes it out to be my fault. I have realized he is not who I thought he was. Really want out of this situation but I quit my job so that I could move in with him and start a new life (how stupid was I). Now, I am trapped until I can find a job and get back on my own. Have a broken heart that can’t even let mend right now. Wanted to believe that he truly loved me.

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