Single Parents Mingle Tips

Are you looking for places where Single Parent Mingle? Well, you’re not alone. Many Christian single parents are looking to mingle with others just like them. A lot of Christian singles have written asking for some single parent mingle tips, not just for dating but also for friendships.

In response several of my Single Parent Mingle friends have suggested the following general common sense starting points for those seeking to mingle with single parents:

Single Parent Mingle Tip 1:

Decide what your passion is, and go where you will meet others doing the same thing. It’s much easier and more fun to meet and mingle with other single parents if you share common interests.

Single Parent Mingle Tip 2:

Follow the kids to their activities and events, as you are sure to meet other single parents in your position. Kids are often a great point of contact for having good conversations with other single parents. Mingling with other singles parents in this way and supporting your children at the same time. What can beat that?

Single Parent Mingle Suggestions

1. Join a Christian singles group or other kind of support group especially for single parents. Are you a divorced single parent? Check out DivorceCare .com
2. Check out a local church for friendship and ministry opportunities The fellowship you will find there will greatly benefit both you and your child(ren).
3. Volunteer at your local Christian charitable organization. You have so many to choose from, and this is not only a great way to lift your own depression, but also a great way to meet and mingle while serving the Lord. How can you beat that, right?
4. Organize a singles only game night. Just tell each single friend that they have to bring two other singles with them. Have everybody chip in a dollar or two for babysitting costs.
5. If you want to mingle online try out Single Parent Mingle. By the way if you’re looking for some great Christian dating tips or other dating/relationship advice you can find it all on this singles site.
6. Can you say Christian bookstore?
7. Go to sporting events in town.
8. Go on a singles retreat.
9. Fact: cooking classes attract lots of singles.
10. Check your local newspapers for upcoming events like craft fairs and flea markets, which attract tons of single parents.
11. If you’re a single parent mom who like sports, you can easily find single guys hanging out at local sports clubs watching the games.
12. Take a lesson in some kind of coed sport.
13. Join a workout club like Bally’s or LA Fitness. They are coed and often have some fun activities to take part in like, say volleyball.
14. Go shopping at the mall. By the way, if you’re going to do grocery shopping, do it directly after work or late in the evening on weekends. These are the peak times singles prowl the aisles for food.
15. Enjoy a Christian coffeehouse or music concert.
16. Why not start a website, newsletter or blog for single parents? (Hmm that sounds like a good idea maybe I’ll do that!) You wouldn’t believe the number of online single parents you would mingle and network with. Just have fun being creative.
17. Your town public library will usually have activities for kids like story time or other activities. This is a huge single parent magnet.
18. How about an inexpensive Christian singles cruise. If you you don’t want to go alone, arrange a group of friends to go.
19. Take ballroom dancing lessons. By the way, wasn’t Shall We Dance a great movie? I really liked that one!
20. Organize a single parent babysitters club in your town. Great way to mingle with other single parents while filling a great need.
21. Parents Without Partners, which helps single parents cope, is an international single parents group. Although NOT specifically a Christian support group, you will find some here.

These are just few idea for single parents who like to mingle.Do you have any other Single Parent Mingle tips you would like to share?

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Single Parents Dating and their Kids

In Parent Education classes, single parents dating or those looking into a Christian matchmaking dating service routinely ask this question: “When can I introduce my children to the person I am dating?”

In a previous article, we discussed how difficult it is being a Christian Single Parent. But it doesn’t matter whether the single parents dating are Christian singles or unbelievers, the issues are still the same. All single parents, custodial or non-custodial, need to take special care when brooching the subject of dating with their kids.

Before a dating single parent even thinks about introducing someone new into their child’s life, they should understand where the child is emotionally during this time.

Depending on the different circumstances that each single parent’s kids have gone through, their reaction to the single parent dating may take on one of several forms.

• They may be fearful of losing the single parent. This is especially true in cases where the other parent has died or abandoned the family. The thinking here goes along these lines: “I lost my dad. Is my mom next?”
• They may be overly possessive and jealous of the single parent’s love, not wanting to share mom and/or dad with anyone else. It’s not uncommon under these circumstances for the child (usually a teenager) to act out against the single dating parent and their partner, which can cause major problems for any relationship.
• They may not trust any outsiders. This occurs in cases where the non-custodial single parent or ex-lover may have abused or neglected the child.
• They may secretly be hoping “mommy and daddy” will get back together again, and will act out ways to accomplish this.
• They may be grossed out or upset by their single parent dating mom or dad expressing romantic feelings for someone other than the other parent.

Single parents thinking about dating should take care because their children almost certainly will experience one or more of the above issues. Before a single parent introduces another person, there are several practical steps he or she can take to help the child and their dating relationship at the same time.

The first thing to do if you are a single parent not dating is to not rush into a “rebound relationship” in order to fill the void in your own life. The honest truth is you’re not ready for it, and neither are your children.

Parenting experts suggest at least a one year’s wait between relationships. Why do they suggest this? How often do we see single parents dating go from one dysfunctional relationship to the next without ever learning from the past? And how about the children who get more confused as they experience loss after loss?

Instead, use this “singleness time” as an opportunity to heal, learn and grow as a single parent. Minister to your children, and let God and His people minister to you. Find a Christian singles group where your heart can find peace and acceptance. God has not forsaken or left you (Hebrews 13:5), and will lead you into a relationship when you are ready.

Secondly,  single parents dating  should keep lines of communication wide open between themselves and their children. Find out what the kids are thinking or fearing and honestly discuss it with them. If they just hate the idea of mom or dad dating, don’t force it on them. Allow them to express themselves, as you practice patience and compassion with your kids. A few sessions with a respected Christian counselor or experienced minister may also help.

Thirdly, the single parent already in a dating relationship should discuss these issues with the person they are seeing, and make a plan on when, where and how they would introduce them to the children. Of course, if you are a Christian I am assuming your dating relationship is not based on casual sex, but is in fact a steady relationship with a committed believer, looking toward the possibility of marriage. Isn’t that the reason you are dating in the first place? It’s interesting that both secular and Christian parenting experts suggest that single parents dating should think twice before introducing their children to people they are casually dating.

If the single parent dating partner reacts selfishly or simply cannot understand the children’s issues, I would pray about cutting losses and ending the relationship, since this would be just the beginning of problems.

Finally, when the single parent dating does decide to introduce their partner to the children, parenting experts suggest it be with little fanfare. In other words, introduce your special friend like you would any other friend, male or female. Avoid using words like love and dating, and do a fun, low stress activity. Only after children have spent several times meeting with the other person, should the single dating parent discuss the nature of the relationship.

Perhaps you are a single parent dating, and would like to share your dating tips with other single parents? Feel free to submit them here.

Note: David Butler, the author of this article, teaches Parent Education classes for the state of New Jersey, USA.

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Christian Single Parents

Kermit the frog says it not easy being green. Move over Kermie, being a Christian single parent is a much harder job…and more lonely. Perhaps this prayer by an anonymous Christian single parent says it all:

“Lord, grant me Time Enough to do all the chores, join in the games, help with the lessons, and say the night prayers, and still have a few moments left over for me;

Energy Enough to be bread-baker and breadwinner, knee patcher and peacemaker, ballplayer and bill juggler;

Hands Enough to wipe away the tears, to reach out when I’m needed, to hug and to hold, to tickle and touch;

Heart Enough to share and to care, to listen and understand, and to make a loving home for my family.”

Phew! I got stressed out just reading it. One of my friends who is a single parent dad to two minor children was discussing the possibilities of using an online Christian dating service. “Eharmony? Christian Cafe? Who has time for single parent dating, and how would the kids handle that? No, with all my daily responsibilities I barely have time to use the bathroom! What I really need are some single parent stress reducers.”

If you are a single parent mom or single dad, and feeling a little like my friend, you’re not alone. Single parent-led households have skyrocketed over the past decade all across Europe, Australia and the U.S. In fact, according to the US Census Bureau, there are over 14 million single parent-led households in the U.S. alone. And many of these folks are single Christians.

Christian Single Parents and Their Needs

Single Christian parents have overwhelming spiritual, emotional and physical needs. Yet, polls also show they are one of the least likely groups to attend church. Why is this?

Money saving worries have led some single parents to work several jobs in order to make ends meet, and they simply do not have the time. Many others, however, feel excluded or stigmatized by the church, and so stay at home. In a nutshell, single parenting is stressful. Period.

When the Scriptures states that believers should care for the poor, the widows and the defenseless, this group of people is not too far removed. Churches and single parent ministries have a great opportunity to show the love of Jesus in this area.

If you are a single Christian parent, and struggling with the burdens of life. let me remind you of some wonderful things:

• Stop feeling guilty! You cannot do it all, no matter what that single parent prayer says. So take a bow (you deserve it!) for the job you are doing and rest in the One who can do it all, and who wants to help you bear the load (Psalms 55:22, Psalms 91, 1Peter 5:7).
• Plan a little time just for you in order to recharge. Even Jesus got away into the wilderness to pray for a while, apart from his kids…the disciples! If that means a bubble bath and a great book, go for it.
• Join a singles group fellowship where you can encourage others and be encouraged. It’s what the Lord wants for you (Hebrews 10:25). While many churches are failing to meet the needs of singles and single parents dating, there are those who have formed local Christian singles support groups and specialized ministries for parents and kids. Find one and stick with it. You and your kids will both be happier for it.
• Remember to leave your anxieties with Jesus, who promises never to leave you (or your kids) nor forsake you (Hebrews 13:5). Are these just empty words, or real promises from a Heavenly Father?

Finally, because we believe local fellowship is a great place to grow spiritually and meet other singles with similar issues, Christian-Dating-Service-PLUS.com is in the process of listing all known singles group ministries in one place for your easy access. If you know of a singles group ministry or single Christian parent support group that should be listed, submit it to us here. Please also consider helping other Christian single parents and other singles by posting your comments

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