Looking for Christian dating advice for college single college students? Let’s be real—college dating is a wild ride. Between classes, late-night study sessions, and figuring out what to eat that’s not ramen, adding dating into the mix can feel like juggling fire. Now, throw in your desire to honor God while dating, and suddenly it feels like you’re navigating a maze in the dark! But hey, don’t panic—I’m here to help. As a pastor on the campus of Rutgers University and a part of Rutgers.Church, I’ve seen it all when it comes to the ups and downs of dating as a Christian in college. So, grab a coffee (or something stronger, like a chai latte), and let’s dive into some solid, faith-filled dating advice with a side of humor.
1. Put God First (Yes, Even Before Your Crush)
Alright, let’s start with the most important thing: **God comes first**, always. You’ve heard it a million times, but let’s break it down in a way that makes sense for your college life. Matthew 6:33 says, *“But seek first his kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well.”* Basically, before you start getting into romantic relationships, you need to check in with God.
Here’s the deal—if your relationship with God is solid, everything else falls into place. So, before you start swiping right or trying to slide into someone’s DMs after Bible study, ask yourself, *Am I growing in my faith?* Your walk with Christ should be the foundation of your life, and when you’re strong in your relationship with God, you’ll be way more prepared to have a healthy relationship with someone else.
**Pro tip**: Don’t try to make someone else fill the hole in your heart that only God can fill. Spoiler: It won’t work, and you’ll end up disappointed. Trust that God’s got your back, and He’s got the plan all worked out.
2. Date with Purpose (Netflix and Chill? No Thanks.)
So, here’s a truth bomb for you: dating as a Christian is about more than just hanging out, having fun, and splitting fries. While that stuff is awesome (who doesn’t love fries?), dating should have a higher purpose. You’re not just looking for someone to binge-watch *The Office* with—you’re looking for someone who shares your faith, your values, and your commitment to living for God.
I know, I know—talking about marriage in your early 20s might feel like a big leap. But here’s the thing: as a Christian, dating isn’t just about passing the time or avoiding loneliness. It’s about finding a partner who’s on the same spiritual journey as you. Philippians 4:6-7 tells us to *“not be anxious about anything,”* so don’t stress about finding “the one” right away. Pray about it, and let God handle the matchmaking.
3. Guard Your Heart (And Maybe Your Netflix Password Too)
Let’s talk about emotions. College relationships can get *real* intense, *real* fast. One minute you’re working on a group project, and the next you’re imagining future wedding hashtags. But Proverbs 4:23 gives us a little reality check: *“Above all else, guard your heart, for everything you do flows from it.”*
What does that mean for your dating life? Take your time. Get to know the person you’re interested in—like, really know them. Ask yourself if they share your values, if they love Jesus, and if they’re the kind of person who will encourage your faith. Don’t just dive headfirst into deep emotional waters before you’ve built a strong foundation of trust, respect, and shared faith.
4. Set Some Boundaries (Aka Don’t Trust Yourself Alone in a Dorm)
Okay, let’s get real for a second. Physical boundaries matter. First Corinthians 6:18 says to *“flee from sexual immorality.”* And look, I get it—college is a place where temptation is everywhere. You’re away from home, you’ve got freedom, and suddenly, those late-night study sessions can lead to more than just reviewing notes.
Setting boundaries isn’t about being a killjoy—it’s about protecting your heart, your relationship with God, and your relationship with the person you’re dating. Talk openly with your partner about your commitment to purity, and set specific guidelines for what that looks like. Maybe that means avoiding alone time in each other’s dorm rooms or not texting after midnight when things can get a little *too* real.
Boundaries help keep your relationship focused on what really matters: building a connection based on faith, friendship, and shared goals. Plus, they save you from the drama and guilt that can come from rushing into something you’re not ready for.
5. Seek Out Wise Counsel (Not Just Your Roommate’s Hot Takes)
Proverbs 15:22 is all about seeking advice, and let’s be honest, your roommates might not always be the best source for relationship wisdom (no offense to your roommates). When you’re navigating the ups and downs of Christian dating, it’s essential to have people in your life who can give you solid, faith-based advice.
That’s where community comes in. At Rutgers.Church, we encourage students to be part of a strong Christian community where they can grow together. Whether it’s your pastor (hey, I’m right here!), a mentor, or a trusted friend, make sure you’ve got people in your corner who are rooting for you and your walk with Christ. Their wisdom can help you avoid unnecessary drama and heartbreak.
6. Be Patient (No, Seriously, Chill Out)
Okay, I know college can feel like a race—everyone’s in a rush to find “the one” or at least someone to share late-night snacks with. But here’s the thing: God’s timing is perfect. Psalm 27:14 tells us to *“wait for the Lord; be strong and take heart and wait for the Lord!”*
So, stop freaking out about being single. God knows what He’s doing. Your worth isn’t tied to your relationship status, and being single is not some sort of curse or punishment. Instead of stressing about finding the perfect person, focus on growing in your faith, working on your goals, and becoming the best version of yourself. Trust me, when the time is right, God will bring the right person into your life—and it’ll be way better than anything you could’ve orchestrated.
7. Date Someone Who Shares Your Faith (And Not Just Because They Post Bible Verses)
This one’s big, folks: **don’t date someone who doesn’t share your faith**. I know it can be tempting, but Second Corinthians 6:14 is clear: *“Do not be yoked together with unbelievers.”* It’s not about being judgmental; it’s about avoiding spiritual conflict down the road.
If you’re serious about your faith, date someone who’s on the same page. You want someone who will encourage you in your walk with Christ, not pull you away from it. A shared faith creates a strong foundation for your relationship—and trust me, that’s going to matter when life gets tough (and it wil8. Keep Christ at the Center (Because That’s the Only Way It’ll Work)**
Once you’re in a relationship, make sure Christ stays at the center. Pray together, read the Bible together, and make your faith a priority. When Jesus is the foundation of your relationship, you’ll be able to navigate the ups and downs with grace, patience, and love.
As a pastor here at Rutgers, I’ve seen so many couples thrive when they put Christ first. He’s the source of all wisdom, grace, and love—and He’ll give you what you need to make your relationship work.
8. Final Thoughts: Have Fun, But Keep Your Eyes on God
Dating in college can be an amazing adventure, but it’s also a time to be intentional. Put God first, set boundaries, and seek wise counsel. And remember, your worth isn’t in your relationship status, but in your identity as a child of God.
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