Christian Relationship Tips: Should I Date Or Marry An Unbeliever?

Christian Relationship Tips: Should I Date Or Marry An Unbeliever?

I often times get asked the question: “Is it ok for me to date somebody if they are not a Christian?”  Recently, I  had a young woman come to me and ask for advice about a guy that she recently met and was into.  She wanted to know my thoughts on the situation and whether or not it was a good idea to date.  This guy wasn’t a Christian, but according to her, he was a great guy and they had everything in common!  He said that he respected her faith even though he didn’t share the same beliefs.  This topic seems to come up a lot within the church, and many people have many different opinions.  Today I want to take a look at what God says about this topic in His Word!

Christian Dating Tips:  Dating A Non-Christian

What does the bible say about dating?  Nothing!  Dating didn’t even exist in those days.  Most marriages were arranged before hand.  However, the bible does have some things to say about marrying an unbeliever- in both the old and the new testament.

“Do not be unequally yoked with unbelievers. For what partnership has righteousness with lawlessness? Or what fellowship has light with darkness? What accord has Christ with Belial? Or what portion does a believer share with an unbeliever? What agreement has the temple of God with idols? For we are the temple of the living God; as God said, “I will make my dwelling among them and walk among them, and I will be their God, and they shall be my people. Therefore go out from their midst, and be separate from them, says the Lord, and touch no unclean thing; then I will welcome you,” –2 Corinthians 6:14-17

“When the Lord your God brings you into the land that you are entering to take possession of it, and clears away many nations before you, the Hittites, the Girgashites, the Amorites, the Canaanites, the Perizzites, the Hivites, and the Jebusites, seven nations more numerous and mightier than yourselves, and when the Lord your God gives them over to you, and you defeat them, then you must devote them to complete destruction. You shall make no covenant with them and show no mercy to them. You shall not intermarry with them, giving your daughters to their sons or taking their daughters for your sons, for they would turn away your sons from following me, to serve other gods. Then the anger of the Lord would be kindled against you, and he would destroy you quickly.”– Deuteronomy 7:1-4

From these passages, we get a pretty good idea about how God feels about marrying an unbeliever.  But what about dating?

The purpose of dating is to get married.  You get to know a person by investing time and energy in the relationship to see if they are the one you want to tie the knot with.  If the person your are dating doesn’t love Jesus, then when they look into your heart at Jesus, the One you value most, they won’t get it.  This will cause one of two things to happen:

1. You can get intimate with the other person by putting God on the outskirts of your life and putting the other person in the center.

2. You can put Jesus at the center of your life and put the other person on the outskirts.

You will be left with always having to chose between Jesus or the other person.  If you think about God during every major decision of your life and the other person doesn’t even believe in God, things are bound to get complicated and difficult!


Although it isn’t necessarily sinful to date a non-believer, it is best to be prayerful and trust God that he will lead you to the right relationship.  God saved you so that your life can glorify Him!  Don’t let an unequally yoked relationship hold you back from living a life that glorifies God!


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