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Pathological Liars: Are You Dating a Liar?

Pathological liars: Are you Dating a liarPathological liars are so good at lying that I pity the poor soul who is dating one, whether through an online Christian service like eHarmony, or some other way. What makes a pathological liar so different from every other big fat liar in a dating relationship?

Psychologists feel the answer is found in a paradox: Pathological liars may actually believe the twisted stories they tell their dates, but at the same time know that what they are doing is lying. What? Don’t worry about it, I don’t get it either.

All I do know is that to avoid heartbreak or worse, Christian singles should do their best to avoid such manipulative, compulsive liars. And some of these people are not just liars, they are crooks and liars. That’s what makes them so dangerous.

Singles who familiarize themselves with the schtick of a pathological liar have the best shot at evading becoming one of his or her “suckers.” Of course, since pathological lying is so believable, even if a person knows the tell-tale signs of a liar, they may still fall prey to this kind of jerk. Nevertheless, here is our “liar, liar, pants on fire” checklist of 7 liar signs to look for in your dating partner.

Pathological Liar Symptoms

  • Liars fidget a whole lot while they talk with somebody. Shifting foot positions, touching their face and mouth area, swaying, rapidly moving hands, and the like, are signs that the person feels uncomfortable while speaking with you, and could very likely be lying.

  • Liars find it almost impossible to stare you in the eyes while speaking with you. Rapid eye movements, and shifting them downward and to the right while the are talking are a strong keys they are not being truthful.

  • Liars tend to hesitate or stutter before answering a question. Often a bad liar will ask you to repeat your question in order to give them more time to make up a lie.

  • Pathological liars are extremely defensive when you question them. If they get overly defensive, asking a question in response to your question, proceed with caution.

  • Liars, especially if they are married or cheating on you, will mysteriously be unavailable for phone calls or e-mail responses. The will also exhibit other inexplicable behavior that makes you wonder if they are telling the truth. Believe your instincts if you feel this way.

  • Liars, no matter how pathological, will eventually get caught up in their own inconsistencies on things like employment, past relationships, talents, financial staus, etc.

  • All types of liars have a hard time giving a simple and short, direct answer. Most pathological liars love to spin stories mixed with truth and untruth in order to build credibility.

Ultimately, whether a single person meets a date through one of the top Christian dating services like eHarmony, ChristianMingle or Christian Cafe, or through a traditional dating path, it’s their responsibility to keep themselves from getting hurt or being deceived by a pathological liar.

Let’s keep our hearts open to romance and love, but let us also use godly wisdom. That’s why the Bible states in Proverbs 4:23: “Above all else, guard your heart, for out of it flows all the issues of life.”

Are you single with some dating experiences to share about pathological liars?

Related Posts:

Safety Dating Tips for Christian Singles
Dating Tip Advice: How to Spot a Dating Married Man
Good Christian Dating Relationship Signs
Dating Advice: When to Dump a Dating Relationship
Christian Singles Dating Unbelievers

Christian Dating Service


  1. Annie

    I am in the same “boat”. I have been with the same guy for 3 years and I recently found out about others. He lies to me all the time to my face. I am leaving the relationship, but have one question. I know one of the women with whom he was with while also with me. I am not angry with her because I realize this is his BIG problem, but I would like to email or call this woman (a very sweet, gentle and kind lady) just to let her know that she is not alone (she had a nervous breakdown). I also want to know what types of lies he told her. (She knows of me and I know of her, but we have never met). I have written a very nice email to her, because I just want to know what types of things he told her. I want to know the truth. We are both Christian women.
    I have a feeling she would love to talk to me. Please don’t say, “let it go”. Others have told me to contact her, just to get this off my mind and get resolution. I actually have a feeling she would like to talk to me too. Opinions…. please,

  2. Pauline

    Don’t even know where to begin. Got swept off my feet by a sweet, loving man (or at least thats what I was lead to believe). Had been so cautious and would look for red flags when I first met someone because did not want to get hurt again. My boyfriend treated me better than anyone has ever treated me but then he asked me to move in with him and I said yes. Wow, what an eye opener it was. I have caught him in so many lies regarding: money, other women, stupid things that really are little things. When I ask him questions about what he told me, he becomes angry and makes it out to be my fault. I have realized he is not who I thought he was. Really want out of this situation but I quit my job so that I could move in with him and start a new life (how stupid was I). Now, I am trapped until I can find a job and get back on my own. Have a broken heart that can’t even let mend right now. Wanted to believe that he truly loved me.

  3. Christine

    Hi Pauline,

    I know it must be hard to be in that situation, feeling trapped. You will find a job and be able to move on.

    When he tries to tell you it’s your fault when you ask questions, don’t ever believe it, it’s just him trying to take the blame off himself. Don’t let him bring you down, you don’t deserve that.

    As for your mending heart, give it to God, He can help fix your broken heart wherever you are. Keep praying and remember God loves you and wants the very best for you. He can and will use any situation for good. I’ll be praying for you.

  4. Jason K

    I met a girl in wal-mart parking lot asking for food. I gave her money cuz she said she needed money to pay light bill. I believed her. She broke down onetime at wal-mart another time saying she wanted to die. I was trying to get God in her life. She was pretty. I thought God could help her. I asked her out. We started dating. She said she needed rent money to keep from moving out of state, she said she wanted to stay wit me. She showed feelings for me. But when I saw eviction notice on her apartment after not hearing from her for days, I called their landlord and he never met her or got any money from her. She would be very defensive, would not be able to get ahold of her. And yes God always catches people in their lies. I was going to try and take her to civil small claims court for lying about what she needed the money for . About 900 dollars. I know God is just, I just pray she repents and serves christ for her own salvation and happiness. Now they have her cousin calling my mom telling lies that shes 15 and all kinds of crap. Bible says liars will burn in lake of fire. If you have any sin in your life, for your own happiness and salvation forsake all evil and turn to jesus that you might get forgivnen. The book of mormon says,”only unto those who show faith unto repentance shall have claim of mercy, unto those that do not shall the full justice of the law be applied.” Jesus also said,”whoever would repent and come unto me with a broken heart and contrite spirit I shall recieve them.” He also said that he suffered those things in the flesh that those that would repent wouldn’t have to.

  5. leanne

    I am so thankful i came onto this site tonight. i have such a heavy heart. my daughter got sucked into a relationship with a boy who we have caught in lies many times in only the 4 weeks of knowing him. (when she brought him over to our house over Christmas break) I love my girl so much and i cant believe she doesn’t see the lies that he is telling her. She goes back to him and tells him the lies we have caught him in and he will twist the story and come back with a new one and she believes he was just mistaken and now this new story she believe also. I am just sick to my stomach about this. He said he had skin cancer even and his kid never had skin cancer. she told him i said he lied and he now says he said he only had skin cancer tendencies, and he didnt say he can cancer, which before he did and now he story changed. I am so sad to think she just let him go from one lie to the next. He said he was addicted to porn also but now he isnt and she is ok with that. and believes he is ok now. but she has only known this boy a few months and is convinced he is so truthful about everything. i didnt have a clue my girl would be so needie that she would fall for this kind of person. I am pray that she will see him for who he is and she will break it off for good but he really know how to pour on the sugar and tell her how wonderful he is and how much he loves and needs her.. and she falls for it.
    from a mothers heart could you guys please say a prayer for me today. and for my daughter to find a real good Christian man..
    my heart is just aching.. i cant even believe she is with him and cant see it

  6. halie

    I have also been dating a pathological liar for almost 2 years now. I was and still am in love with him. I strongly believed God had brought us together. i cought him in several lies and there were red flags here and there throughout our relationship that i should have paid more attention to but i let them go. We got engaged last october and i started having a strong feeling that something was not quite right. I knew he was hiding something and so when he took his phone in the bathroom i followed him and asked to see what he was doing. He wouldnt and i finally said you can either give me the phone or ill give you my engagement ring. HE said fine took the ring and left. I fionally found out by looking through his email that he was getting on craigslist personals hitting on girls and lying about himself which he has been doing from the beggining of our fairytale relationship. He also said that he had gone into the bathroom to email a girl from his class and then reized that was weird when i walked in. he says he is going to get help and wants to be with me when he gets better. I am afraid that he will end up doing this sort of thing again though and may even have an affair latter in mairrage. Please give some advice on what to do.

  7. Hadda

    @ Rider,
    I can understand where you are coming from, but I disagree. Are you suggesting that people should offer themselves to these sociopaths because they are victims of something they cannot control? Most sociopaths do not have any empathy, gving them any makes it worse. It will always come back to bite the one who is trying to help. I tried and I payed for it big time, I am still crying till this day (sometimes). Because sociopaths feel sorry for themselves they should be cuddled? I understand that they are actually very lonely people looking for love and attention, but they are also narcissists who will harm you if they get the chance. why would any body volunteer for that? Like drug addicts they can only change when they want to, not because you or anybody else wants them to or because it is better. Only when they hit rock buttom. Ohh no no I want to scream from the rooftops to run run as fast one can away from these people. Every body does something wrong from time to time,, but when they don’t feel anything or even thean try to take advantage of the situation they are sick and only God can help them. They cannot do anything about it, neither can anybody else. Even if they do not mean to hurt others, they know they do, because everytime they are they arrive somewhere, someone gets hurt, they KNOW THAT. When they want to change, change will come. I’ve learned my lesson! Who says that admitting (I don’t mean to get personal) is some way of these people to get sympathy? I’ve tried so hard and I am doing better bla bla. Nope never again. To many promises none where kept. life is just to short to be carrying someone elses cross on top of my own.

  8. Kasey

    I dated a pathological liar for almost 6 years! He was my first relationship so I have gotten so much practice for the next one. I watched him for years lying and manipulating other people. He always cared about being the best and never took responsibility for anything he did. I realize now that he had been lying to me the whole time we dated. My dumb self dated him for 2 years while he was 1600 miles away. He did God knows what and would have an excuse for everything I found ( I had resorted to looking through his stuff). If I hadnt have started looking through his stuff I wouldnt have realized the type of person he really was. I learned that liars do not have morals at all. THey feed on attention…..and bad mouth those who they are suppose to caring about….how do I know this? because after we broke up, he immediately started dating his now fiancee and cheated on her and talked about her like crap the whole time they dated….I realized he was talking to her behind my back while we were having problems….and they only dated for like 6 months before he proposed…after I threatened him that if he ever contacted me again I would tell her everything he had done……He doesnt know what true love is….and not only that, but he is a charmer….he knows what to say to a female and he showers her with his money and gifts. I cant believe I almost married him!!!! Thank God I got tired of that mess and said I didnt want to marry him because I didnt trust him anymore. Now everyone think Im the one who lost a “good man” and think he is so great and that I am the reason we broke up. Sometimes I want to tell his fiancee the truth but if she thinks she knows him after 8 months then whatever…I knew how he was and I was in love with him till the end. And honestly I still care about him…he hurt me so bad…and ended up just blocking me out of his life when I decided I wasnt going to be there for him anymore..I feel like I was just a possession to him now. I feel sorry for his fiancee cuz I doubt he is going to change. That whole relationship was based off lies…….and he is a preacher’s son!

    THank God I am out of that relationship! My stress levels has gone down 100%!!


    I don’t want to be unkind, but I try to live my life in a state of
    equanimity. If you don’t know what the word means perhaps you should look it up. Some of the things you said to me when I first met you, this was after I gave you my business card were inappropriate as far as I am concerned. You sound like a party boy, and there are plenty of wild women in Honolulu. I am not one of them. Regardless from that We are not on the same page, and never will be. When you sent me the text saying you literally just got back from a trip to Japan- that was ABSURD. Please read the article- I am not sending it to hurt you, but to help you. Oh and by the way- you don’t text someone you just met after 12:30 am. Please do not text-email me or call me again.

    Thank you,



  10. Rebecca mills

    Hi i know how it feels to feel angry being angry at someone can mean you care still and your hurt it doesnt nessasarily mean you hate someone or will not forgive them in time, you can and with the help of god you can so seek gods face hun and tell him how you feel ask him to restore your emotions and thoughts so that you have all your focus on god, your fam and friends the ones who will always be there for you NO MATTER WHAT ^_^

    I dont have to know you to say this if i call myself a true follower of god i love you very much sister in christ and i know you will find a good mature godly charecterd man who will treat you well just trust god and enjoy your life with the lord, fam, freinds.

    I am in a simular situation however he is not my boyfriend i really like hima dn he is talking to someone else he says he is godly charectered doesnt beive in the term christian because of the history it holds constinetine etc. I know i have to tread carefully and i should seek god i care for him he hasnt always treated me well he was talking to this lady he says the reason he is not with her is because he like me.

    However he has met her and gone cinema with her and they have had lunch and go for walks its possible he is lonely as he has no christian friends and she is a beliver but im still praying and being cautious and not commiting to him at all do you see where im going with this men are not our whole life they are not all bad but they are a part of life created to bless people and be blessed and serve god sincerely i promise your not loseing a lot if he couldnt do this or give you the love and respect god has told him to in the bible then he is JUST NOT WORTH YOUR TEARS OR ALL YOUR FOCUS AND THOUGHTS EVERYDAY HE IS WORTH YOUR PRAYERS, GODLY LOVE, AND FORGIVENESS THOUGH.

    Ask god to help you forgive him i promise lovely in time you will seee how it helps you more than anyone if you release him to the lord and gradually with gods help forgive him (: i love u all the best xxx BECKY.

  11. Mike Roger

    Sadly i am a pathological liar too. To every girl, family friends and colleagues. I can’t help it. I need help bad..- Mike

  12. StrongerEveryDay

    This is a great site! I wish I had more time to write, but I do want to ask ‘the group’ one thing. Have any of you, after confronting the person you’re in a relationship with about lies he or she has told, been told THIS by them? “Well, if you go looking for trouble, you’re probably going to find it.” That used to baffle me! Dude, I wasn’t looking for trouble, I was on a quest for the TRUTH! GEEZ! If there’s anyone reading this who can’t decide whether or not they should get out of a relationship with a liar, let me help you out: GET OUT ASAP! Time spent with a liar is time wasted in SO many ways! My ex-fiance (who’s in his 50’s) went to treatment, mental health hospitals, was prescribed medications, hit rock bottom in many ways, has been cut off by all of his family members; they want nothing to do with him, and STILL, he lies.

  13. leah olding first named chaned for portection on…

    Hi I going to attempt to tell all the young woman and men out there that if your dealing with a pathological liar you must stop yourself from being their prey. They are manipulative not to mention controlling and very cold personalities. They will never be faithful, kind or considerate and yes you will always come last in their life.

    How do I know that because I married a man twenty five years ago and he is actually worse now than when I married him. Why is his condition worse because lying is a way of life not even a bad habit.

    You will definitely know the definition of the word HURT. Here’s mine Hell U Really Tried if you have to experience this over and over again you will become cold yourself with little or no patience for anyone and you don’t even realize you have changed more like the liar even though you probably don’t lie. These people are aggressive and love to degrade others for their imperfections. Most of these people inflate their ego to a standard that is false.

    You must leave your soul outside the door if your going to venture into a relationship with a pathological liar and pick it up on the way out the door when you finally have had enough of untruth.

    I have wasted the better part of my life with a man that has been emotionally cruel who has had threesomes with his best friends just to kick me in face for a laugh at my expense. He was used by a cruel girl who was married to his best friend and she was sexually abused as child and will do anyone for sex and even her husbands friends. This girl does threesomes on the internet videos and also with anyone who is willing.

    No ladies or gentlemen you do not want to experience these types of issues in your relationships. My spouse has also ran around every chance he got. Run from them they will destroy your desire for lust of life.

    Why did I stay, well my Husband is very Narsisttic and leaving would mean years in court for a divorce costing me every dime I have to live on. I worked for lawyers in divorce and believe it or not through experience sometimes it is easier to let them believe their lies than to get away.

    You kind of move forward with your own life and still have some money to live on. These people don’t hold down jobs very long so you know who will be supporting them you. They are excellent at clutching your heart in the palm of their hand and squeezing the life out of it in the future. Please leave as soon as they start lying and being unfaithful or you will need more faith than you could of ever imagined. Sincerely

  14. Lorraine

    I beblieve my son is dating a pathological lier. He is in-live with her and has moved out and is living with my sister and his gf. I am on good terms right now with both of them but I have caught her in many tangled lies. She twist storys around and blames family members, She has my son believing her lies and we all see it but him. One of my other sons said that one day the mask she wears may become who she is..the fake her, the kind her..but still I pray for my son to see the truth sooner then later!

  15. Watchout

    Aj Arbes mackey is on these websites praying on women and feeding them lies and dreams he uses women and will jump right in a relationship telling you he loves and paints a picture of being a hardworking great man but really is a pathilogical liar with several other girlfriends and always on the hunt.
    This man is so convincing and has fooled many women including me thingsto look for:hiding phone,wont bring you to house,claims hes always working,wont answer phone after certain time and always talks to you on the phone in his car,wont answe phone but will text,he is very sneaky and cant be trusted.his whole life is a lie

  16. I think I am dating a pathological liar. I’m 18 and he’s 24.. He started lying a while ago and i just thought he was a general liar.. but things got weird when it was consistent, and within the space of 10 minutes he could make me believe one thing fully, and then change the story and lie to cover it up so i’d believe that :S its so weird. He’s the nicest guy I’ve ever met… and recently he snapped and just wasn’t himself.. – i had to ring the police on him because i was scared or worried that he was on drugs. – he went to hospital and they gave him anti-deppresants because apparently he was suicidal.. but i don’t know if this is really the case. without saying goodbye he has gone somewhere hours away to stay.. and left me with all the baggage. He blaims his lying on stress or says he didn’t mean to lie. but its too much now. Him being away right now is worse than him actually being here! because more lies seem to be unfolded now that he’s away and he keeps saying he’s going to come back a changed man but i doubt it very much! I’m hurting so much and the fact he’s not here and even if he was – i don’t believe anything he says.. is he a pathological liar?.. p.s – he has dyslexia and his mum left him as a child.

  17. Carol

    I am married to a pathological liar for two years and finally left him so I could recover my sanity. I met this jerk on a dating site. Over time I found out he had been married eight times and has two kids. When I first met him he told me he was married once and that his wife died in childbirth and that later on his daughter died in a car accident when she was 18. Liars usually play the sympathy card just to win you over. He used to go on dating sites while I was at work and recently he started getting calls in the middle of the night. Whenever I confronted him about his cheating on me, he would tell me I was crazy. He would always bad mouth my family and then act really sweet when he was around them. Everything he tells me is a lie and now I suffer with stomach ulcers because of the aggravation he put me through. If a person tells you he loves you without getting to know you “Run.” These liars will say anything to win you over and then they will ruin your life.

  18. Maxine

    Christian? this? this blog above is sick, teaching women how to be neurotic about every little move the man makes. Of course you trust your instincts about people, but don’t let this bitter dry prune who writes here get you to be like she is: pre-judging people, looking for shit in everything the other person says or does. This isn’t christian, or even smart. It’s bitter, wrong, ugly crap.

  19. Karol

    I don’t think I would call the man that I was involved with a “pathological” lier. I think that he may have had a personality disorder. But, that doesn’t take the hurt away. We were actually friends for about 6 months before we started dating. I think I fell in love with him a little while we were friends. But, even in the beginning, my gut told me something wasn’t right and I just didn’t trust him, although at that time, I didn’t know why. But, I thought they were my issues, so I talked myself out of my gut telling me something. About a month and a half of dating, I caught him in a lie. We talked about it, he apologized. This happended several times. It was never over anything “big”, but they were still lies. We would break up for a short period of time, but I would always go back because he would tell me that he lied because he was afraid of losing me and he loved me. Finally, I just couldn’t ignore my gut anymore, and I did something totally unlike me, I went through his phone. I found out for at least two months, he was communicating with what I believed to be his ex-wife. I started to piece little things together. When I confronted him, he tried to lie. But when I started to call her, he finally admitted that he was still married!! They both swear that nothing sexual was going on and that they were just discussing their divorce, but I was broken. It is so hard to believe that he did this to me. I gave him everything. He told me that I made him happier than he had ever been in his life. He was so loving and sweet. So, I sit here and struggle with still loving him and realizing that he lied to me pretty much from day one. How do you get your heart to stop loving him?

  20. non christian

    OMG I am not a christian but came across your site whilst searching re how to leave pathological liar. I got involved 18 months ago with a guy via the internet. we commenced weekend relationship. He was very into seeing me for the whole weekend – which in retrospect I found a bit much as I wanted time for my other friends and hobbies (I am not a youngerster mature with grown up children). Told me he owned his house, had been bankrupt once and was now very careful with money, had been in army , told me stuff about that as “he wanted me to know what I was dealing with”. told me love of his life died in his arms at 18 from leukemia: etc etc. then “sold his house” and “rented it back ” doh why was I so stupid . Moved into my house, now I am discovering all sorts of things suspicions aroused when Irealised he always burnt his mail, ; never has any cash, but also talks about buying next expensive boy toy. He is in my house, acts very loving, but can change in a flick of a second/switch. Has not physically or emotionally hurt me but tries to control by being quietly angry if Ido something that displeases – go out to do my hobby for instance. I have found out through various means that he has significant debts and it is looking as though he never owned his house, he has also lied to me about something he said my father said to him. I am quite frightened as I feel that he could turn very very nasty if I confront him. Am treading water while I figure out what to do. he has installed all his work equipment (he programmes computers) , his pets etc., into my house; Please please do background checks before getting involved, I felt that I should be trusting, nice etc., etc. he despises people that are “nice” regards them as weak.I can see how as christians you are extra vulnerable as there is all the turn the other cheek stuff, see the christ in every one etc. etc. I would say to anyone here do not think you can change others; and onlylooking for the good in people gets us in serious trouble. Also I guess allowed some pretty dubious priests to get into positions of power. I have no arguement with Christ by the way and think it is a good way to live, just dont happen to believe it is the only way. Good luck all of you I need to go back to plotting my exit strategy, and yes the emotional part of me still loves him.

  21. Sabrina Norstram

    There are two types of liars, those that are compulsive and those that are sociopaths. I married a sociopath. I knew he lied, he acted as if he could not help it, he even said things such as “what if I can’t quit lying” Then it escalated after his daughter got married, then his one sister died. he lies about everything big and small and pulls me in and I have been noticing he does get satisfaction when he can win me over. He told his daughter I am crazy and on drugs. I was the one who brought up giving money to her for her wedding, she is not young by the way. I did make a major mistake talking about Jehovah’s witness not knowing the new son in law was one, but it was one sentence as in people on my road should keep their doors shut due to they are coming door to door. My husband lies about money and awhile back he almost bankrupted us, I made a plan with a company who helps people in debt, it took six years to do it but we did. Now he is gambling, I found he owed $75.00 to a work friend. I have had spine surgery and did not want to go to a bar with him and his sister, he said he would not be gone long, 5 hours later and then he said the only thing he did wrong was not be realistic with telling me the time that was needed to get there and home. He went to a motel, I guess he did that thinking that was my worst fear, losing him. He lost his wedding band somewhere at the motel, he said he looked for it but not like I would have being out there in sunlight the next day, he bought a new one. He is going on a golf outing, he even told me I ok’ed it, no I did not. Then he said he already gave them the $50 deposit of the almost $500 for the 4 days and 3 nights. he told me there is a stripper club some of the guys go to but he won’t go, I shouldn’t worry. He said yesterday he would rather take care of things for himself only in foul words than touch me. I went to my Dr and I am situationally depressed, which I knew but I also wanted to make sure that the medication I need to take isn’t the problem because that is what he is telling people, that it makes me crazy. My sister had a stroke and now needs a cardiac catheterization, I am worried about her. He asked yesterday after calling me names and screaming if I loved him because I used the past tense of love, I don’t member saying love to him! He then said if I don’t love him then what’s the point, yes it is my fault in his eyes, again. I refuse to be scared because now I know he feeds off it. He told me I was his friend and his lover and he would never go out to a bar or on a vacation without me, even insulted the guys he works with that they live near each other and go to social events together and he would never be like that, but here he is going “golfing” which is on his “bucket list” He actually used that term. That must have took at least 15 minutes of his drive home to think that one up. I could vomit in his “bucket list” Brett Gyllenskog is learning to lie better, lower toned voice etc. he acts as if he has me figured out. Like with the gambling, he just didn’t tell me the amount. The bar, “I didn’t factor in the time and you are ridiculous thinking an hour when it takes that long to get to and from our house. He said he would spend a “short time” at the bar. Then I said to him “about an hour” Bar, not driving and even then I gave in due to his sister died. Oh and he used a term I had the florist put on the flowers it was something like “sister first, mother always”. He had to sound good on facebook. He throws his arm down like the king when he has to stop watching golf or football, in fact he enjoys making me wait to talk until commercials. That is easily seen. The think that made me understand that he is a sociopath was when he went back on me being his friend. That was my lightbulb moment and it hurt. Now I am in limbo, not sure what is next except like I said I have my sister to worry about and taking care of myself, I had to retire due to my spine, which reminds me, instead of saying I have a spinal cord injury which is the truth he told his daughter it was my medications that are the problem. I am not “allowed” around her by her own words because she doesn’t feel comfortable “yet” and then she skirted around the time I took getting ready and about medications. My husband was to straighten things out before this and he came home and said too many people there, on faceboook, one other person who stayed an hour. He had time to talk to them, instead he made things much worse by yes lying about me to his own daughter. He was eating wings and hanging out, facebook again, he is incapable of seeing himself for what he truly is and apparently he has told everyone in his family lies about me. I realized that because he had me convinced I talked about his daughter to a niece of his. when I brought it up she told me not to worry about it, she is sick of the gossip! So yes, it took years, I knew he lied but I didn’t know he was a sociopath until he was willing to take the one thing way I thought we had, friendship and we would enjoy vacations and going out together because friends do that. See in this clique who he claimed he did not like and would never hang around with, they are not taking their wives. It is bad, not sure what is next. I wrote him an email and was pretty civil and I was angry and crying, he is not home from work. I texted him. what is the point of being afraid. I read where the one who doesn’t care is the one who wins, well I want him to stop being a lying sociopath and I will not be called names. I was married before and he was abusive in all ways. Looks like I did it again except he is a liar, he did push me once but I flew hard into cabinets and if I would have been hurt he would have lost his job. I do not think he was concerned about my health or if I was hurt, but he has not of yet pushed or hurt me physically again. He does not want me to have an affair, he obsesses about his first wife having an affair when he was sleeping but yet they went on to have a daughter then HE had an affair after playing some strip game, not strip poker. I doubt his wife even had an affair and when I finally said so, his eyes showed, this one time, yes he lied. there is more but I am feeling angry and he will be home soon so I am going to stop. Praying for this evil to stop.

  22. Andrea

    My boyfriend is a sociopathic liar.

    He has ruined his own life, mine and the life of our children. He puts his interests above everyone and everything.

    He lies when the truth will do.

    He has found himself in deep financial and probably criminal trouble. He wants us all to sacrifice for him. He’ll get off with no down side, I’ll be lumbered with another debt. There’s no remorse. And it will happen again. And again. And again.

    And yet when you put it to him that his behaviour is abhorrent, he becomes defensive and pushes it back.

    And he’s threatening to kill himself if I don’t agree to help him “undo” all his lies. Lies, upon lies, upon lies, upon lies.

    When will this ever end?

  23. Clover

    I have been dating my boyfriend for 2 years and have been friends with him for over 4 years beforehand. I recently broke up with him due to his lies and lies. I always knew he lied but only a little bit and I overlooked them because I just love him so much. It never really directly affected me until now when he dropped off the face of the Earth for a week without contacting me even once. I had been calling daily and leaving text messages but he never responded so I had to resort in sending him an e-mail. He finally replied telling me that he had been really depressed because his friend from Korea was in a coma. He had mentioned this friend before but I always had a feeling it was just a lie to sound cool to have friends from different countries because I have seen him sign on her email and her facebook page with had very few friends which all played a similar facebook game. In addition I had never seen her number stored into his phone, or a number with an Area code from Korea or out of country number. It all seemed to suspicious but it wasn’t a big deal to me at the time. I told him that if he needed some time to himself he didnt have to avoid me and could have responded to a message saying he was going through something and needed time to himself. But instead he made up a wild story saying he was depressed over a friend in Korea. I then told him he should visit her since she is in a coma and may die at any second. Then he replies saying that he has visited her. We both live in the US and still live with our parents. So I just didn’t see how he could have left town without anyone knowing. SO i asked when he left to see her, and he said it was a few weeks ago when I know for sure he was in town and at work during that time.. SO i ask for his passport and plane ticket. He claimed someone else bought the ticket and had his passport. If that wasn’t enough he just kept insisting this friend of his was real! I was so fed up with him putting lies on top of each other that I had to end it. Now he is still avoiding me and won’t meet up to speak about our relationship and is still holding onto my items as a way to keep a hold on me. I am so upset and angry. Most of all I feel numb because I don’t know what to beelive and without trust, how can love survive? I am so numb, I do not know what to feel.

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